If the answer is yes and you want me to congratulate you or offer words of support then tell me and I will be there for you.
However, don't expect a response from your news and feel you have the right to accuse me of not being a proper friend, who cares and is too busy with their new mates if you either a) tell me on facebook or b) mass text the world.
If my words of wisdom and congratulations are needed so much then pick up the phone or tell me face to face.
If you're too busy to seek me out then I'm too busy to reply.
Monday, 29 March 2010
Wednesday, 24 March 2010
When holidays go wrong?
Planning this years holiday has made me think about some of the things have happened to us as a family on our travels.
France 2000
Hubby and I had been together for 6 weeks and we decided to take his son and my 3 boys to Brittany for a week, see how we all got on away from the traumas of divorce.
They were aged 10, 7, 5 and 13 months. We had bought a people carrier the week before but it wasn't ready for collection. I had sold my car so here was the dilemma. 6 people and 5 seats. We amended the ferry booking but they wouldn't let us on the boat with 4 kids in the back seat, we told them the baby wasn't coming and turned up at the port. They let us on it was a bit nerve racking but we had a lovely time.
Brittany 2001
Me, hubby, and 5 kids, this time we took my step daughter. We needed to book a hotel for a stop over on the way back. We stayed in a Formule 1. A double bed with a bunk above. We booked two rooms. You do the math. We checked in. Hubby went in with 2 kids, brought 1 back out, I went in with 2, brought 1 back out. Hubby went in with 1 and I went back in with the last one. Sorted. I think the man on reception knew something was up but not what.
Bordeaux 2002
Me, Hubby and the 4 boys. Now how this was quite my fault I'll never know.
I book the holidays in our house. Ferry plus roof box and bike rack complete with 4 bikes. Arrived at Portsmouth an hour before boarding, checked in and informed there was no booking for the bikes or the roof box. OMG. Informed Hubby who went ballistic, shouted at me so I walked off.
It was then I noticed other families having the same arguments, spoke to a couple who informed me they had been told the same despite the paperwork saying other wise. What to do? Some people who lived near by returned their bikes home to board the ferry, as we were 150 miles from home we didn't have that option. Spoke to the check in staff, devised a plan and put it to Hubby. He was not happy.
By now we had the 7 seater and this was the plan. We fold the seats down put the roof box and 4 bikes inside the car and while Hubby drives the car onto the ferry the kids and I go on as foot passengers. Well I don't know about you but in these situations I get the giggles. Hubby yelled at me again, so I walked off with the kids for a cuppa while he sorted the car. After a nice relaxing crossing, we had 2 cabins, we arrived in France at 6am and again after another fit of giggles, I took the kids for breakfast while he swore at the bikes and the roof box and we completed our journey looking like The Clampitts on tour, minus granny with her shotgun.
America 2003
Just me and hubby. Baggage handlers strikes at Heathrow, people camped out for days. Media everywhere.
We drove down the night before and stayed at an airport hotel. We walked to terminal 4 two hours before we were due to fly. On a flip chart there was our flight number ready for check in. There were thousands of people. GMTV were broadcasting live. We argued. Hubby said it wasn't that simple and we'd be waiting for days to fly out.
I ignored him, walked into the building with case and passport. It was deserted. Hubby was shouting at me again (do you get the theme here?)I strolled up to check in and that was that. I was frazzled from arguing with hubby, the check in staff apologised for our 'long' delay and upgraded us to business class for being so patient with them. We didn't confess we'd only been there 5 mins.
France 2007
Me, hubby and my eldest. We spent a long weekend in Paris via the ferry. Sat in the car waiting to disembark, the lorry next to us revved up his engine and before being told to move off, drove down the side of our car and two others. French Police were not too impressed with either him or us. So with a dented car we drove onto Paris, yep hubby shouted at me, as if that was my fault either.
On the Monday son and I left hubby at the hotel, he was flying back at the end of the week, so Jamie and I headed off to Calais. We had been shopping and had filled the car with booze. I don't speak a lot of French but can get by.
At check in I was asked where the other passenger was, all in French. I explained Peter was flying back on Friday. 'Who is the child in the car' 'It's my son I replied' 'do you have proof?' 'yes, I have his passport' 'but you have different surnames' 'yes, I have remarried' this went round in circles for 10 minutes before they let us through.
We got stopped at customs, again, all spoken in French
'Get out the car, not the child. How many people are in the car?'
1
'many people are travelling?'
2
'How many people are there altogether?'
2
'Open the boot, Take it all out, Bring it in here'
Son wasn't allowed to help me, neither did customs. Every bag was xrayed.
'You may go now'
They walked off leaving me to make several trips from the building to the car with all the beer and wine.
There are numerous other little disasters but the absolute best was:
America 2007
Me, Hubby and the 4 boys. There was a power cut at Manchester airport we were delayed for 12 hrs, with 4 kids how we argued. At this point hubby realised he didn't have his lap top bag and mass panic followed. I calmly rang my friend who dragged her 6 week old baby to our house to retrieve said lap top from the front door step. It was 6am.
We flew to Chicago, had missed our connecting flight but there was one in 10 mins we were escorted at speed to the plane. Captain made an announcement. We had a flat tyre and wouldn't be flying for another hour, back off the plane and more rows. We arrived in Las Vegas at 4am minus two bags, checked into our hotel and slept. By this time we'd been up for nearly 30 hrs.
We drove nearly 4000 miles in 3 weeks visiting the sights and family. Our flight home couldn't be any worse could it? We took off from Vegas had been in the air an hour when an hysterical woman stood up and yelled 'is there a Doctor on board?' silence till we made an unscheduled stop in Denver before flying on to Chicago where they had held the plane for an hour and back home.
France 2000
Hubby and I had been together for 6 weeks and we decided to take his son and my 3 boys to Brittany for a week, see how we all got on away from the traumas of divorce.
They were aged 10, 7, 5 and 13 months. We had bought a people carrier the week before but it wasn't ready for collection. I had sold my car so here was the dilemma. 6 people and 5 seats. We amended the ferry booking but they wouldn't let us on the boat with 4 kids in the back seat, we told them the baby wasn't coming and turned up at the port. They let us on it was a bit nerve racking but we had a lovely time.
Brittany 2001
Me, hubby, and 5 kids, this time we took my step daughter. We needed to book a hotel for a stop over on the way back. We stayed in a Formule 1. A double bed with a bunk above. We booked two rooms. You do the math. We checked in. Hubby went in with 2 kids, brought 1 back out, I went in with 2, brought 1 back out. Hubby went in with 1 and I went back in with the last one. Sorted. I think the man on reception knew something was up but not what.
Bordeaux 2002
Me, Hubby and the 4 boys. Now how this was quite my fault I'll never know.
I book the holidays in our house. Ferry plus roof box and bike rack complete with 4 bikes. Arrived at Portsmouth an hour before boarding, checked in and informed there was no booking for the bikes or the roof box. OMG. Informed Hubby who went ballistic, shouted at me so I walked off.
It was then I noticed other families having the same arguments, spoke to a couple who informed me they had been told the same despite the paperwork saying other wise. What to do? Some people who lived near by returned their bikes home to board the ferry, as we were 150 miles from home we didn't have that option. Spoke to the check in staff, devised a plan and put it to Hubby. He was not happy.
By now we had the 7 seater and this was the plan. We fold the seats down put the roof box and 4 bikes inside the car and while Hubby drives the car onto the ferry the kids and I go on as foot passengers. Well I don't know about you but in these situations I get the giggles. Hubby yelled at me again, so I walked off with the kids for a cuppa while he sorted the car. After a nice relaxing crossing, we had 2 cabins, we arrived in France at 6am and again after another fit of giggles, I took the kids for breakfast while he swore at the bikes and the roof box and we completed our journey looking like The Clampitts on tour, minus granny with her shotgun.
America 2003
Just me and hubby. Baggage handlers strikes at Heathrow, people camped out for days. Media everywhere.
We drove down the night before and stayed at an airport hotel. We walked to terminal 4 two hours before we were due to fly. On a flip chart there was our flight number ready for check in. There were thousands of people. GMTV were broadcasting live. We argued. Hubby said it wasn't that simple and we'd be waiting for days to fly out.
I ignored him, walked into the building with case and passport. It was deserted. Hubby was shouting at me again (do you get the theme here?)I strolled up to check in and that was that. I was frazzled from arguing with hubby, the check in staff apologised for our 'long' delay and upgraded us to business class for being so patient with them. We didn't confess we'd only been there 5 mins.
France 2007
Me, hubby and my eldest. We spent a long weekend in Paris via the ferry. Sat in the car waiting to disembark, the lorry next to us revved up his engine and before being told to move off, drove down the side of our car and two others. French Police were not too impressed with either him or us. So with a dented car we drove onto Paris, yep hubby shouted at me, as if that was my fault either.
On the Monday son and I left hubby at the hotel, he was flying back at the end of the week, so Jamie and I headed off to Calais. We had been shopping and had filled the car with booze. I don't speak a lot of French but can get by.
At check in I was asked where the other passenger was, all in French. I explained Peter was flying back on Friday. 'Who is the child in the car' 'It's my son I replied' 'do you have proof?' 'yes, I have his passport' 'but you have different surnames' 'yes, I have remarried' this went round in circles for 10 minutes before they let us through.
We got stopped at customs, again, all spoken in French
'Get out the car, not the child. How many people are in the car?'
1
'many people are travelling?'
2
'How many people are there altogether?'
2
'Open the boot, Take it all out, Bring it in here'
Son wasn't allowed to help me, neither did customs. Every bag was xrayed.
'You may go now'
They walked off leaving me to make several trips from the building to the car with all the beer and wine.
There are numerous other little disasters but the absolute best was:
America 2007
Me, Hubby and the 4 boys. There was a power cut at Manchester airport we were delayed for 12 hrs, with 4 kids how we argued. At this point hubby realised he didn't have his lap top bag and mass panic followed. I calmly rang my friend who dragged her 6 week old baby to our house to retrieve said lap top from the front door step. It was 6am.
We flew to Chicago, had missed our connecting flight but there was one in 10 mins we were escorted at speed to the plane. Captain made an announcement. We had a flat tyre and wouldn't be flying for another hour, back off the plane and more rows. We arrived in Las Vegas at 4am minus two bags, checked into our hotel and slept. By this time we'd been up for nearly 30 hrs.
We drove nearly 4000 miles in 3 weeks visiting the sights and family. Our flight home couldn't be any worse could it? We took off from Vegas had been in the air an hour when an hysterical woman stood up and yelled 'is there a Doctor on board?' silence till we made an unscheduled stop in Denver before flying on to Chicago where they had held the plane for an hour and back home.
Tuesday, 2 March 2010
Law 11 - Offside
OFFSIDE POSITION
It is not an offence in itself to be in an off side position.
A player is in an offside position if:
he is nearer to his opponents' goal line than both the ball and the second last opponent.
A player is not in an offisde position if:
he is in his own half of the field of play or
he is level with the second last opponent or
he is level with the last two opponents.
OFFENCE
A player in an offside position is only penalised if, at the moment the ball touches or is played by one of his team, he is, in the opinion of the referee, involved in active play by:
interfering with play; or
interfering with an opponent; or
gaining an advantage by being in that position.
NO OFFENCE
There is no offside offence if a player receives the ball directly from:
a goal kick
a throw-in
a corner kick
INFRINGEMENTS AND SANCTIONS
In the event of an offside offence, the referee awards an indirect free kick to the opposing team to be from the place where the infringement occured.
PLEASE NOTE IT IS IN THE OPINION ON THE REFEREE NOT THE MATCH COMMENTATORS.
It is not an offence in itself to be in an off side position.
A player is in an offside position if:
he is nearer to his opponents' goal line than both the ball and the second last opponent.
A player is not in an offisde position if:
he is in his own half of the field of play or
he is level with the second last opponent or
he is level with the last two opponents.
OFFENCE
A player in an offside position is only penalised if, at the moment the ball touches or is played by one of his team, he is, in the opinion of the referee, involved in active play by:
interfering with play; or
interfering with an opponent; or
gaining an advantage by being in that position.
NO OFFENCE
There is no offside offence if a player receives the ball directly from:
a goal kick
a throw-in
a corner kick
INFRINGEMENTS AND SANCTIONS
In the event of an offside offence, the referee awards an indirect free kick to the opposing team to be from the place where the infringement occured.
PLEASE NOTE IT IS IN THE OPINION ON THE REFEREE NOT THE MATCH COMMENTATORS.
Friday, 19 February 2010
Things that upset me
Yesterday there were two tweets that upset me.
When I write random tweets or make silly inappropriate comments people will respond to me and not always in the nicest of manners. I know it's difficult to express oneself in 140 characters but there is plenty of room to put a :-) or a lol.
I would prefer it if you sent me a DM airing your concern for me to clarify my comment, unless of course I have made the comment directly to you, then as far as I'm concerned it's fair game.
Yestersday there were two seperate @replies to general comments I made about my life, kids and interests that did not deserve the response I got. I actually went to bed slightly upset about it.
I refuse to get drawn into pettiness and gave the tweeters the benefit of doubt.
However, this morning I went into town and I forgot my shopping list, common practice for me. I stood in the co-op and felt tears welling up in my eyes. It was a silly trigger point, I know, but never the less it made me realise what was missing.
So I went and did something stupid.... I went to my friends house for a coffee and a good old fashioned natter and felt alot better straight away
When I write random tweets or make silly inappropriate comments people will respond to me and not always in the nicest of manners. I know it's difficult to express oneself in 140 characters but there is plenty of room to put a :-) or a lol.
I would prefer it if you sent me a DM airing your concern for me to clarify my comment, unless of course I have made the comment directly to you, then as far as I'm concerned it's fair game.
Yestersday there were two seperate @replies to general comments I made about my life, kids and interests that did not deserve the response I got. I actually went to bed slightly upset about it.
I refuse to get drawn into pettiness and gave the tweeters the benefit of doubt.
However, this morning I went into town and I forgot my shopping list, common practice for me. I stood in the co-op and felt tears welling up in my eyes. It was a silly trigger point, I know, but never the less it made me realise what was missing.
So I went and did something stupid.... I went to my friends house for a coffee and a good old fashioned natter and felt alot better straight away
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
Just my perspective on life
I am not a writer or am I an authoritarian on life.
When I blog it is in response to conversations I've had in real life or on twitter and I feel the need to expand things a bit more than 140 characters will allow.
I read peoples blogs with interest but don't always want to post a comment unless it relates to me 100%.
I read some very sad things and some very funny things but if I disagree with the authors blog content I do not comment on it. It is their opinion or view on life, not mine.
I do have a view on life but it is my own if it is not interesting to you or relevant then don't knock it.
This blog has come about because of a comment I made on a previous blog of mine where I offered an opinion of other peoples blogs in general. It was my comment on on my views. I received one response on the blog which I was able to discuss with the person involved. Which was good to be able to do.
What I didn't like or appreciate were the 2 DM's I received from people who were obviously upset by my comments which, without naming anyone, they felt I was making a personal attack on them. Well I'm sorry some people are so sensitive and think the whole world revolves around them. I'm not sorry I didn't enter into their silly games just simply blocked them from Twitter.
So if those two people that DM'd me are still reading this.....I'm not a perfect Mummy nor do I claim to be one either and.... by the way....that's your problem not mine.
When I blog it is in response to conversations I've had in real life or on twitter and I feel the need to expand things a bit more than 140 characters will allow.
I read peoples blogs with interest but don't always want to post a comment unless it relates to me 100%.
I read some very sad things and some very funny things but if I disagree with the authors blog content I do not comment on it. It is their opinion or view on life, not mine.
I do have a view on life but it is my own if it is not interesting to you or relevant then don't knock it.
This blog has come about because of a comment I made on a previous blog of mine where I offered an opinion of other peoples blogs in general. It was my comment on on my views. I received one response on the blog which I was able to discuss with the person involved. Which was good to be able to do.
What I didn't like or appreciate were the 2 DM's I received from people who were obviously upset by my comments which, without naming anyone, they felt I was making a personal attack on them. Well I'm sorry some people are so sensitive and think the whole world revolves around them. I'm not sorry I didn't enter into their silly games just simply blocked them from Twitter.
So if those two people that DM'd me are still reading this.....I'm not a perfect Mummy nor do I claim to be one either and.... by the way....that's your problem not mine.
Sunday, 14 February 2010
Growing up with Teenagers
There are loads of blogs out there on being a parent with young children. 'Is smacking wrong?' 'How much TV is too much?' and what drives me mad more than anything else are the 'Aren't I just the perfect mummy' blogs.
I had my eldest child when I was 6 weeks short of my 21st Birthday, maybe I was too young? who knows...it doesn't matter now my baby boy is 18 and in May and I have two other boys aged 15 and nearly 11.
When my children were little none of my friends had kids and could never understand why I was tired, too busy or just preferred to stay in. As my kids got older my friends started having theirs. One or two friends have young teens but most of them have children in primary school and here's the problem. They seem to think that 1. I have the answer to every bloody problem and 2. I understand every issue they face and am willinging to drop everything to offer advice, support and help. 3. My kids are independent now and lucky me I have more free time.PAH!!
Do you know what my kids still pose me problems. Having two step kids I am now on my 3rd lot of GCSE's can I get the 15 year old to study/behave/spend less time on the Xbox/tidy his room? No. Where do I go for advice and help? I don't I just grow/develop/change with my kids and accept that each one will do things differently and pile the stress on anyway they see fit.
I had my eldest child when I was 6 weeks short of my 21st Birthday, maybe I was too young? who knows...it doesn't matter now my baby boy is 18 and in May and I have two other boys aged 15 and nearly 11.
When my children were little none of my friends had kids and could never understand why I was tired, too busy or just preferred to stay in. As my kids got older my friends started having theirs. One or two friends have young teens but most of them have children in primary school and here's the problem. They seem to think that 1. I have the answer to every bloody problem and 2. I understand every issue they face and am willinging to drop everything to offer advice, support and help. 3. My kids are independent now and lucky me I have more free time.PAH!!
Do you know what my kids still pose me problems. Having two step kids I am now on my 3rd lot of GCSE's can I get the 15 year old to study/behave/spend less time on the Xbox/tidy his room? No. Where do I go for advice and help? I don't I just grow/develop/change with my kids and accept that each one will do things differently and pile the stress on anyway they see fit.
Wednesday, 10 February 2010
How does a step child address their step mum?
Have been reading @mediocre_mum's blog on terms of endearment and adults referring to them selves as Auntie and Uncle.
http://mediocremum.wordpress.com/2010/02/09/term-of-endearment/#comment-134
I have commented on her post and while I was doing so it got me thinking about my relationship with my step son. He is 20 now and left home two years go. But from the age of 10 I have raised him alongside my other 3 boys.
I consider myself to have 4 children and a step daughter. The reason I call her my step daughter is because she is profoundly disabled and at 22 I am not old enough to be her mother. I also find it very difficult when asked about her disability and 'was she born like this' 'or did something happen to her'. I can't comment other than to say 'it was from birth' 'no there was no indication prior to her birth' and 'yes it must have been very difficult for her mother and father' I cannot comment on that as I am not her birth mother.
Moving back to the reason for my writing this blog is my step son.
So what does he call me? Well, he's always used my 1st name and nothing else. He refers to me as mum and has 3 brothers and 1 sister and if anyone ever said 'you're mum is here' etc he has never corrected them. My children also call my husband by his first name. Youngest goes through periods of calling him dad or daddy and again the kids never correct anyone. My children have a very good, close and frequent relationship with their dad but consider themselves to have 2 sets of parents each teaching them valuable skills and alongside all that extra love don't forget the extra gifts at christmas and birthdays.
Step son has grown up with me being his friend and not a parent. Everything I've ever done with him has caused him grief. If I told him off he'd contact his mum and she would remind me I'm not his mother, she is. None of this was helped by me not having a name he could use.
Using my first name was too informal for a child to call me but using 'step mum' sounds too harsh. 'Auntie' doesn't sound permanent enough and 'Mrs' .... well just plain stupid.
He's all grown up now and left home. If he gets in trouble or needs anything its me he comes running to.Since he's left home I don't know what his relationship with his mother is like now but that's his decision.
But what should he have called me? Is there an official word to use to describe someone that has become your mum and has raised you, but their biological mother is still around?
I'd be interested to know.
http://mediocremum.wordpress.com/2010/02/09/term-of-endearment/#comment-134
I have commented on her post and while I was doing so it got me thinking about my relationship with my step son. He is 20 now and left home two years go. But from the age of 10 I have raised him alongside my other 3 boys.
I consider myself to have 4 children and a step daughter. The reason I call her my step daughter is because she is profoundly disabled and at 22 I am not old enough to be her mother. I also find it very difficult when asked about her disability and 'was she born like this' 'or did something happen to her'. I can't comment other than to say 'it was from birth' 'no there was no indication prior to her birth' and 'yes it must have been very difficult for her mother and father' I cannot comment on that as I am not her birth mother.
Moving back to the reason for my writing this blog is my step son.
So what does he call me? Well, he's always used my 1st name and nothing else. He refers to me as mum and has 3 brothers and 1 sister and if anyone ever said 'you're mum is here' etc he has never corrected them. My children also call my husband by his first name. Youngest goes through periods of calling him dad or daddy and again the kids never correct anyone. My children have a very good, close and frequent relationship with their dad but consider themselves to have 2 sets of parents each teaching them valuable skills and alongside all that extra love don't forget the extra gifts at christmas and birthdays.
Step son has grown up with me being his friend and not a parent. Everything I've ever done with him has caused him grief. If I told him off he'd contact his mum and she would remind me I'm not his mother, she is. None of this was helped by me not having a name he could use.
Using my first name was too informal for a child to call me but using 'step mum' sounds too harsh. 'Auntie' doesn't sound permanent enough and 'Mrs' .... well just plain stupid.
He's all grown up now and left home. If he gets in trouble or needs anything its me he comes running to.Since he's left home I don't know what his relationship with his mother is like now but that's his decision.
But what should he have called me? Is there an official word to use to describe someone that has become your mum and has raised you, but their biological mother is still around?
I'd be interested to know.
Wednesday, 3 February 2010
Airport Scanners
There have been many interesting debates on the use of Airport scanners. I work in Child Protection and have been asked many times for information on this subject in regards to scanning Under 18s.
The media have been less than helpful with the information they have been giving the public and in my opinion have been causing alarm and have not been supportive in their reporting.
I would like to get on an aeroplane and arrive alive at my chosen destination. If that means I have to be scanned then so be it. If it means my children have to be scanned then go ahead I give my full consent, although it is not required.
I contacted the Department of Transport and they replied this morning. I am satisfied with their explanation as to how the scanners are operated and would like to share their response with you.
You can also view their Code of Practice as to how they will operate and I think it is a very well written piece of information.
The use of body scanners for children is compatible with the Protection of Children Act 1978. The use of scanners will be subject to the Codes of Practice developed by the DfT, other government departments and the aviation industry.
Screening staff will be situated at a location away from passengers so they will not be able to associate an image with a particular individual. The equipment deployed in airports does not have the capacity to save an image in any form.
The media have been less than helpful with the information they have been giving the public and in my opinion have been causing alarm and have not been supportive in their reporting.
I would like to get on an aeroplane and arrive alive at my chosen destination. If that means I have to be scanned then so be it. If it means my children have to be scanned then go ahead I give my full consent, although it is not required.
I contacted the Department of Transport and they replied this morning. I am satisfied with their explanation as to how the scanners are operated and would like to share their response with you.
You can also view their Code of Practice as to how they will operate and I think it is a very well written piece of information.
The use of body scanners for children is compatible with the Protection of Children Act 1978. The use of scanners will be subject to the Codes of Practice developed by the DfT, other government departments and the aviation industry.
Screening staff will be situated at a location away from passengers so they will not be able to associate an image with a particular individual. The equipment deployed in airports does not have the capacity to save an image in any form.
Thursday, 21 January 2010
Is this normal family life or am I doing something wrong?
A brief picture of my family.
On any one night they can be 1 person in this house or there could be 7.
My family is combined of a husband with 2 children. Step daughter is profoundly disabled and lives in a care home approx 20 miles away. Stepson is 20 and he is in th British Army stationed in Germany.
I have 3 children all boys. Eldest is 17 and is at catering college, Middle son is 14 and a budding football star and youngest is 10, career and ambitions as yet unidenified.
Husband works away most weeks and stays in a company flat in Manchester, where he gets time alone to relax, unwind, have a drink without having to go out to pick kids up from various locations and watch what he wants on the TV. He works very long hours both home and abroad and really misses being away from home.
I work part time in Child Protection, am studying for a degree in Criminology and Psychology and teach Learning Support Assistants on NVQs. I also help to run my sons local football team and I'm an avid supporter of Birmingham City Football Club.
Life in this house is very stressful most of the time. A typical week for me comprises of Sea Cadets for youngest two on Mondays and Fridays, teaching Tuesday nights, Football training on Wednesdays, locally and on Friday evenings middle son trains in Birmingham. Saturdays youngest is at school and Sundays middle son has football matches all across the West Midlands.
All sounds fairly normal, why is this so stressful for me?
A typical evening for me is middle son from school at 3pm, youngest from school at 5pm, cook tea, help with Prep. Take kids to various activities, make pack lunches, wash up, collect eldest at 8pm, washing and ironing, collect kids, tidy away, bath, TV and bed. If my husband comes home that means there's another tea to cook as he's never home when the kids need feeding.
Alternate weekends Step daughter is home, she requires 24 hour supervision, without it she as a risk to herself and others.
Step son comes home on major holidays for several weeks at a time and having another adult in the home doesn't always work out especially when the Alpha male in him is present for the duration.
Eldest is a referre in youth football and is a season ticket holder with Birmingham City, he is rarely at home and when he is he locks himself in his bedroom with his X box and live subscription. He works 3 evenings a week in the kitchens at Malvern College and requires collecting at 8pm.
Middle son is my main concern at the moment he is extremly stressed out with his GCSE's. Today I had a phone call from school with the head of upper school telling me my son needed his head testing. It was parent evening tonight and he had thrown a wobbly last lesson told the science teacher to piss off and stormed out of school...could I please come into school...right now.
I had a chance to see him before I left and he told me the teacher had told him to 'shut up and sit down you sound like a Pixie' It was all I could do not to laugh out loud. FFS Dan is 6ft tall with size 12 feet, have never seen anything so un-Pixie like in my life.
I spoke to the other teachers who informed me that he works hard in lessons, completes his homework and is a popular nice young man, nothing like the science and maths teachers have described in previous reports. However he can be gobby and disprutive but no more than anone else and does respond to being asked firmly to be quiet and get on with his work.
Then there's the youngest, what can I say about him. He attends a boarding school the other side of the Malvern hills, we use the boarding facilities when he is displaying extreme behaviours and when there are fun things on he wants to do. It is also cheaper to have him boarding for a night instead of getting a babysitter. He is dyslexic and has a gluten intollerance. In every other way he is a normal 10 year old with stroppy behaviour when he can't get his own way. However, when he is in a bad mood and has been fed Gluten his behaviour becomes unmanagable to the absolute extreme. As a family with have the full support of CAFCAS, children services and from our Doctor.
So thats my complicated life. Is it any different from yours? There is one plus point to it all apart from the obvious things like all the pleasure the kids give me and how proud I am of them. And that is on alternate weekens they bugger off to stay with their Dad....and relax...no that's when I clean the house and do my studying for my degree.
Oh and don't forget I can always find the time to tweet. I'd go stark raving mad witout it.
Will it ever end?
On any one night they can be 1 person in this house or there could be 7.
My family is combined of a husband with 2 children. Step daughter is profoundly disabled and lives in a care home approx 20 miles away. Stepson is 20 and he is in th British Army stationed in Germany.
I have 3 children all boys. Eldest is 17 and is at catering college, Middle son is 14 and a budding football star and youngest is 10, career and ambitions as yet unidenified.
Husband works away most weeks and stays in a company flat in Manchester, where he gets time alone to relax, unwind, have a drink without having to go out to pick kids up from various locations and watch what he wants on the TV. He works very long hours both home and abroad and really misses being away from home.
I work part time in Child Protection, am studying for a degree in Criminology and Psychology and teach Learning Support Assistants on NVQs. I also help to run my sons local football team and I'm an avid supporter of Birmingham City Football Club.
Life in this house is very stressful most of the time. A typical week for me comprises of Sea Cadets for youngest two on Mondays and Fridays, teaching Tuesday nights, Football training on Wednesdays, locally and on Friday evenings middle son trains in Birmingham. Saturdays youngest is at school and Sundays middle son has football matches all across the West Midlands.
All sounds fairly normal, why is this so stressful for me?
A typical evening for me is middle son from school at 3pm, youngest from school at 5pm, cook tea, help with Prep. Take kids to various activities, make pack lunches, wash up, collect eldest at 8pm, washing and ironing, collect kids, tidy away, bath, TV and bed. If my husband comes home that means there's another tea to cook as he's never home when the kids need feeding.
Alternate weekends Step daughter is home, she requires 24 hour supervision, without it she as a risk to herself and others.
Step son comes home on major holidays for several weeks at a time and having another adult in the home doesn't always work out especially when the Alpha male in him is present for the duration.
Eldest is a referre in youth football and is a season ticket holder with Birmingham City, he is rarely at home and when he is he locks himself in his bedroom with his X box and live subscription. He works 3 evenings a week in the kitchens at Malvern College and requires collecting at 8pm.
Middle son is my main concern at the moment he is extremly stressed out with his GCSE's. Today I had a phone call from school with the head of upper school telling me my son needed his head testing. It was parent evening tonight and he had thrown a wobbly last lesson told the science teacher to piss off and stormed out of school...could I please come into school...right now.
I had a chance to see him before I left and he told me the teacher had told him to 'shut up and sit down you sound like a Pixie' It was all I could do not to laugh out loud. FFS Dan is 6ft tall with size 12 feet, have never seen anything so un-Pixie like in my life.
I spoke to the other teachers who informed me that he works hard in lessons, completes his homework and is a popular nice young man, nothing like the science and maths teachers have described in previous reports. However he can be gobby and disprutive but no more than anone else and does respond to being asked firmly to be quiet and get on with his work.
Then there's the youngest, what can I say about him. He attends a boarding school the other side of the Malvern hills, we use the boarding facilities when he is displaying extreme behaviours and when there are fun things on he wants to do. It is also cheaper to have him boarding for a night instead of getting a babysitter. He is dyslexic and has a gluten intollerance. In every other way he is a normal 10 year old with stroppy behaviour when he can't get his own way. However, when he is in a bad mood and has been fed Gluten his behaviour becomes unmanagable to the absolute extreme. As a family with have the full support of CAFCAS, children services and from our Doctor.
So thats my complicated life. Is it any different from yours? There is one plus point to it all apart from the obvious things like all the pleasure the kids give me and how proud I am of them. And that is on alternate weekens they bugger off to stay with their Dad....and relax...no that's when I clean the house and do my studying for my degree.
Oh and don't forget I can always find the time to tweet. I'd go stark raving mad witout it.
Will it ever end?
Friday, 2 October 2009
#fancydressfriday Twitter
Having fun this week as the winner of #fancydressfriday. Wearing my costume at a variety of locations. Hubby slightly amused over the weekend now thinks I'm completely bonkers, which I probably am. Nagged 17 year old son to crawl round the loft space until he found something I could wear. I rejected his first choice of a Santa hat. His reply 'for god sake Mum, get a life.' Now bribing the kids to take photos.
Spent Friday night celebrating my win with a glass of Rum and coke. Did ask if I could crack open the champagne, that didn't even raise a smile from Hubby. Firmly told 'no' 'grow up'. Then did some sewing as my 14 year old son left for France on Saturday morning with Sea Cadets aboard the TS John Jerwood. By Tuesday he and the crew had made it to Brighton Marina. And finally to bed in costume, hubby lost his patience by now and refused to talk to me till I took the dam thing off, slept like a baby dalek all night in it.
Saturday saw me in #fancydressfriday at Barnard's Green Cricket Club for Malvern Town Wanderers football open day. A huge success we signed 23 mini kickers, gave away goodie bags and footballs. I helped serve up the bacon butties and drinks to parents whilst dressed as a Dalek.
Sunday was the autumn show at the Three Counties Showground, did a bit of gardening in the morning in #fancydressfriday then spent a lovely afternoon with 10 year old son buying useless things that may come in handy one day. Not sure when that day will be but sure we'll find out soon.
Monday in the office all day sorting out case files and chasing up some loose ends. Got spotted by the neighbours hanging up the washing in #fancydressfriday. Tried to explain twitter but they didn't have a clue. I have 2 twitter friends in my town but haven't met either of them yet. Gave up 2 hours of my time to 'help' hubby set up his new computer. For 'help' read 'watch'.
Tuesday spent hanging round the garage, in Cheltenham, for the best part of the day. Popped in to see step daughter for a bounce on the trampoline and cup of tea. Then off to Asda for the weekly shop. Hubby hid #fancydressfriday costume and I finally found it in a case in his office just in time to bake my son his Gluten free cakes for school.
Wednesday a really boring day. Housebound and cleaning windows, bathrooms, dusting and hovering all in #fancydressfriday costume, got a bit hot and there wasn't anyone in so set up the camera on the timer which took more shots of the back of me as I tried to get it right. 17 year old son came home with a friend and is still not speaking to me as I showed him up, his mate, however, is wetting himself laughing and thinks it's great, finally had an audience to talk twitter to as he had at least heard of it but said he doesn't tweet as it's for old people. Cheeky bugger. Hubby away for the night so had uninterrupted fun on Face book.
Thursday in the office for the morning persuaded a colleague to take a photo of me at my desk, although there was a condition I had to let him have a copy of the photo. Agreed as he was the only one in the office that noticed I had had my hair done last week and now have lots of blonde streaks. Don't know if everyone else in the office has noticed it or doesn't like it. Who knows? Who cares? My evening was spent running kids around to various activities.
It is now Friday and my last day of #fancydressfriday. Didn't wear my costume on my epic journey from Worcester to Ramsgate return leaving home at 4am and returning at 2pm. 447 miles and was only there for 10 minutes to collect son and 3 Sea Cadet buddies after they spent the week sailing to France. I won't be putting the costume back in the attic just yet as I wear it every year to hand out the goodies on Halloween. It's sad now that the kids are no longer interested in this activity. 10 year old will go out for half an hour if he can persuade anyone to take him, to rob the neighbours of their sweets but isn't interested in dressing himself or the house up, thankfully the boys still love Christmas, although I think they humour me with the decorating. Will sit down this evening and search for #fancydressfriday and announce the winner live on twitter. I wonder if they will do the same next week or just keep their avatar up. Hope the spirit of #fancydressfriday continues. Last job to do in #fancydressfriday is to wash the costume. Off to bed early tonight as this week’s activities have left me exterminated.
Finally quote from hubby 'thank f*** for that, now will you pay the family some attention this week' huh see above what does he think I've been doing all week?
Spent Friday night celebrating my win with a glass of Rum and coke. Did ask if I could crack open the champagne, that didn't even raise a smile from Hubby. Firmly told 'no' 'grow up'. Then did some sewing as my 14 year old son left for France on Saturday morning with Sea Cadets aboard the TS John Jerwood. By Tuesday he and the crew had made it to Brighton Marina. And finally to bed in costume, hubby lost his patience by now and refused to talk to me till I took the dam thing off, slept like a baby dalek all night in it.
Saturday saw me in #fancydressfriday at Barnard's Green Cricket Club for Malvern Town Wanderers football open day. A huge success we signed 23 mini kickers, gave away goodie bags and footballs. I helped serve up the bacon butties and drinks to parents whilst dressed as a Dalek.
Sunday was the autumn show at the Three Counties Showground, did a bit of gardening in the morning in #fancydressfriday then spent a lovely afternoon with 10 year old son buying useless things that may come in handy one day. Not sure when that day will be but sure we'll find out soon.
Monday in the office all day sorting out case files and chasing up some loose ends. Got spotted by the neighbours hanging up the washing in #fancydressfriday. Tried to explain twitter but they didn't have a clue. I have 2 twitter friends in my town but haven't met either of them yet. Gave up 2 hours of my time to 'help' hubby set up his new computer. For 'help' read 'watch'.
Tuesday spent hanging round the garage, in Cheltenham, for the best part of the day. Popped in to see step daughter for a bounce on the trampoline and cup of tea. Then off to Asda for the weekly shop. Hubby hid #fancydressfriday costume and I finally found it in a case in his office just in time to bake my son his Gluten free cakes for school.
Wednesday a really boring day. Housebound and cleaning windows, bathrooms, dusting and hovering all in #fancydressfriday costume, got a bit hot and there wasn't anyone in so set up the camera on the timer which took more shots of the back of me as I tried to get it right. 17 year old son came home with a friend and is still not speaking to me as I showed him up, his mate, however, is wetting himself laughing and thinks it's great, finally had an audience to talk twitter to as he had at least heard of it but said he doesn't tweet as it's for old people. Cheeky bugger. Hubby away for the night so had uninterrupted fun on Face book.
Thursday in the office for the morning persuaded a colleague to take a photo of me at my desk, although there was a condition I had to let him have a copy of the photo. Agreed as he was the only one in the office that noticed I had had my hair done last week and now have lots of blonde streaks. Don't know if everyone else in the office has noticed it or doesn't like it. Who knows? Who cares? My evening was spent running kids around to various activities.
It is now Friday and my last day of #fancydressfriday. Didn't wear my costume on my epic journey from Worcester to Ramsgate return leaving home at 4am and returning at 2pm. 447 miles and was only there for 10 minutes to collect son and 3 Sea Cadet buddies after they spent the week sailing to France. I won't be putting the costume back in the attic just yet as I wear it every year to hand out the goodies on Halloween. It's sad now that the kids are no longer interested in this activity. 10 year old will go out for half an hour if he can persuade anyone to take him, to rob the neighbours of their sweets but isn't interested in dressing himself or the house up, thankfully the boys still love Christmas, although I think they humour me with the decorating. Will sit down this evening and search for #fancydressfriday and announce the winner live on twitter. I wonder if they will do the same next week or just keep their avatar up. Hope the spirit of #fancydressfriday continues. Last job to do in #fancydressfriday is to wash the costume. Off to bed early tonight as this week’s activities have left me exterminated.
Finally quote from hubby 'thank f*** for that, now will you pay the family some attention this week' huh see above what does he think I've been doing all week?
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