Well Happy New Year to one and all.
It's been a different year from anything I've ever experienced, same hassles and lows. Family, kids, finances, work, study etc and some fantastic highs, new cultures, living in a new counrty.
A few months ago I met Kate who blogs over on http://kateonthinice.wordpress.com/2011/12/31/how-to-guarantee-that-2012-is-a-happy-new-year/#comment-1257
Grooving Mums blog hop was set up for a variety of reasons, but mainly to get people together, mums whom felt they'd lost their way, to support one another along the way.
Each week kate sets a challenge and this week is Resolutions she has asked us all to think about the following:
1. What do I want to change?
I WANT TO CHANGE THE WAY I RESPOND, THE WAY I REACT TO PEOPLE AND SITUATIONS.
2. Am I sure I am doing this for me and not just to please others or to live up to some society image of womanhood?
YEP 100% FOR ME. I GET UPSET, I SHOUT, I CRY, I FEEL WEAK, I FEEL I'VE TAKEN SEVERAL STEPS BACKWARDS.
3.What’s the one thing you can do today, right now, towards your goal? That would be joining #groovingmums by the way lol.
RIGHT NOW....THERE ARE ISSUES I NEED TO DISCUSS, TODAY IS NOT THE DAY, NOTHING CAN BE DONE ABOUT THEM TODAY, SO WHY BRING THEM UP? I'M GOING TO WRITE THEM DOWN, TELL HUBBY WE NEED TO TALK AND PICK A TIME WHEN HE'S NOT CHARGING OUT THE DOOR TO WORK OR MORE IMPORTANTLY JUST WALKED IN THROUGH THE DOOR AFTER A HECTIC DAY AT WORK.
Saturday, 31 December 2011
Friday, 30 December 2011
Our first Christmas in South Africa
Too much food.
It’s that time of year where we over eat for a few days, maybe a week. But I’ve been over eating for the past month. I’ve put on weight; I feel bloated and have been suffering with indigestion.
We eat so differently here in South Africa, Hubby has always loved cooking and is very good at it. I’ve not been bad at it but with working full time I would more often open a packet of chicken Kiev’s with mash than cook a meal from scratch. Well that all stopped when we moved here and I’ve not bought a single thing from the freezer or anything in a box with ‘Ready Meal’ on it since we’ve moved here. *ice cream, peas and pizza bases excluded.
We buy far less junk food, crisps, biscuits, chocolate due to the price, individual bars the same as UK but we’d always pick up the offers, buying far more food/snacks than we needed and we’d eat them. There is less snacking between meals also.
No DFS adverts here
There was snow in the UK two weeks ago; it was dark by 4pm the lights on the houses were on, the shops full of Christmas goods, people filling their trolleys, carols, Noddy Holder and generally a feeling of Christmas. But I arrived home to South Africa 5 days ago, it was 30c, we were in the pool, the air conditioning is on and I feel Christmas has been and gone.
But they do have Christmas here, it’s a question I’ve been asked and ‘why not? why wouldn’t they have Christmas?’
Yes there are lights on houses, there is Christmas music in the shops, the tree is up, presents underneath, cards on the wall and the sun is shining and that’s odd. The shops are quieter, there is less panicking, haven’t seen a single Christmas advert on the TV, ‘your child will be unhappy unless they have this......’ far less pressure, far less commercialism and not one ruddy DFS advert.
I asked don twitter if there were any Christmas traditions I could observe and everyone said ‘no, not really’ but I’ve since discovered most people seem to have their turkey on Christmas eve and then a less formal lunch on the day itself of salads, cold meats etc, this is due more to the heat than anything else and I may regret my decision to cook a full roast by the time the sun comes up.
The decorations are the same here, tinsel, baubles, fairy lights, snow scenes. I was slightly disappointed that it wasn’t different, but I hadn’t really considered what Christmas was like, how it went here. I asked ‘why the snow scenes? Why the same as the north?’ the general reply? ‘Santa is from the north and it snows there so we honour that tradition’
So I’ve hung elephant and zebra on my tree to give it that South Africa feel.
Post Christmas
Well there isn’t one, not in the way I’m used to in the UK, shops on reduced hours, but then that happens often, certain places close early on a Saturday and many places aren’t open on a Sunday.
There are no obvious sales, by Wednesday the shops were empty of Christmas stuff, decorations, cards, food etc...a few shops had some Santa chocolate on sale but that was it.
Public transport...do you use it?
There isn’t any in South Africa....that’s what I’m told. Well actually there is but I’m also told NOT to use it, it’s not safe, trains are dirty, overcrowded there is trouble on them, expensive. There is the Gautrain running from the airport to Pretoria and many stops for shopping and entertainment, but we’ve not been on it yet and I’ll tell you why.
I’ve missed public transport, the freedom to catch a train to Birmingham to watch the football, a train to Worcester for work or shopping. Putting the kids on a train to visit their dad and catching the bus back from town if I did too much shopping to carry.
But on this trip to the UK I’ve realised that I haven’t missed it at all, not one bit. My first train journey on my UK visit was from Gatwick to St Albans, OK granted it was 7am and travelled through London, yes it was going to be busy, but it was over crowded, I stood up for the 90 minutes it took, stopping at many places to pick up even more people. I had two cases, it was hot, people were shoving their way on and off and people were narky with me for taking up the room. No one said anything directly but there lots of comments behind my back.
The next train I caught was from Reading to Newport. I had a seat; there were TV screens, like on an aeroplane, £1.73 per journey and a good selection of programmes. It was a cleaner train with a buffet car. I hate that, you have to plan your trip for coffee to ensure you don’t stop at a station whilst you’re gone so no one can steal your luggage.
The third train trip was to Birmingham to watch the football. I parked in Colwall a few miles from Malvern as there is off road parking available which is free. An uneventful trip to the football, freezing cold, made better by the fact we won. I had a seat on the train, but it was over crowded and a few people were getting narky as they thought they had the right to a seat and not someone else of the same age/ability. If they had a disability or were pregnant and it wasn’t obvious then they should’ve said. Anyway as is typical of this train journey, there was an announcement that the train wasn’t going past Great Malvern and we were to alight and wait for the next one in 20 minutes. So shivering on an open platform, we waited and there was an announcement that the nest train to Hereford had been delayed. We shivered for an hour.
There was one bus trip from Bath to Bristol...£9...FFS...here I found the answer to the question ‘where do they get these people from?’ Seems half the passengers were off to appear on the Jerry Springer show.
I realised I miss public transport because it wasn’t available, not because I enjoy using it.
I’ve missed public transport, the freedom to catch a train to Birmingham to watch the football, a train to Worcester for work or shopping. Putting the kids on a train to visit their dad and catching the bus back from town if I did too much shopping to carry.
But on this trip to the UK I’ve realised that I haven’t missed it at all, not one bit. My first train journey on my UK visit was from Gatwick to St Albans, OK granted it was 7am and travelled through London, yes it was going to be busy, but it was over crowded, I stood up for the 90 minutes it took, stopping at many places to pick up even more people. I had two cases, it was hot, people were shoving their way on and off and people were narky with me for taking up the room. No one said anything directly but there lots of comments behind my back.
The next train I caught was from Reading to Newport. I had a seat; there were TV screens, like on an aeroplane, £1.73 per journey and a good selection of programmes. It was a cleaner train with a buffet car. I hate that, you have to plan your trip for coffee to ensure you don’t stop at a station whilst you’re gone so no one can steal your luggage.
The third train trip was to Birmingham to watch the football. I parked in Colwall a few miles from Malvern as there is off road parking available which is free. An uneventful trip to the football, freezing cold, made better by the fact we won. I had a seat on the train, but it was over crowded and a few people were getting narky as they thought they had the right to a seat and not someone else of the same age/ability. If they had a disability or were pregnant and it wasn’t obvious then they should’ve said. Anyway as is typical of this train journey, there was an announcement that the train wasn’t going past Great Malvern and we were to alight and wait for the next one in 20 minutes. So shivering on an open platform, we waited and there was an announcement that the nest train to Hereford had been delayed. We shivered for an hour.
There was one bus trip from Bath to Bristol...£9...FFS...here I found the answer to the question ‘where do they get these people from?’ Seems half the passengers were off to appear on the Jerry Springer show.
I realised I miss public transport because it wasn’t available, not because I enjoy using it.
Travel isn’t easy
After 4 days back in the UK I was in immense pain with my neck and shoulder, same thing happened after the UK trip in August. What causes it to flare up like this? I was injured over 15 years ago and lived in constant pain, medication and numerous treatments from the local hospital; I’d have a few good days at the most. Since moving here the pain has gone. No work, less driving, no stressing myself out trying to fit everyone and everything into our busy lives and the heat has helped tremendously.
But 2x8 hour flights, dragging suitcases, bed hopping and driving followed by 2x8 hour flights and I’m buggered and it’s going to take a while to recover.
Ok I’m now stress free, living in South Africa, no work, studies, and only 2 kids instead of 5, no constant running around for various and many activities. I swim everyday and I enjoy cooking for and looking after my family as a role now rather than a chore.
Well I lie slightly, I’m stressed after nearly a year of doing things on my own in regards to ‘how to live here’ I’m struggling to resolve issues with banks etc in the UK and I’m stressed at feeling undervalued in the job market which has hindered my ability to function properly in this country without constant ‘permission’ from hubby to set household accounts up. But the task of renewing things this year is less daunting as I know how and where to get these things done at least.
But 3 weeks in the UK and my stress levels were sky high. Why? Trying to accommodate everyone. I take too much on, try to do too much, OK I’ll leave YOU out from my visit...oh you didn’t mean that did you?
I found UK driving stressful, most of my trips were at the end of the day in the dark, I’d forgotten how dark it was, street lights run out when you leave the town and many major roads don’t have them either, long journeys after a busy day. I struggled with headaches, tired eyes and stiff neck and back. It’s a chore I haven’t missed. I drive here, but apart from a day trip, its short local visits and I rarely drive at night here.
Each place I visited fed me, wanted to know about our ‘exciting’ lives in South Africa, they obviously don’t read my blog then, it’s mundane, it’s routine, I didn’t object but I found it different to inject something new into it and I tired of saying the same things.
I want/need to connect to the internet, use the phone, speak to hubby, followed by a long soak in the bath and a steaming mug of tea, chill in my pjs after a long day and a comfy bed, but that would be rude so I keep on going.
The there is the shopping and gifts, which to my dismay aren’t going to fit in the suitcases (they did in the end, but left little room for me to buy things) I’d forgotten how unfriendly the UK was, it was crowded, people were rude, pushing and shoving, tutting and complaining about the queues, banging into you with their shopping bags without so much as a sorry or a sideward’s glance.
I wanted/needed light and space. The UK was dark, I know it was winter but on one day I glanced at my watch thinking it was nearly 5pm but it was only 1.30pm, in the afternoon.
I missed my family and friends, but I didn’t miss my old lifestyle, I was ready to go home, I just needed some space.
But 2x8 hour flights, dragging suitcases, bed hopping and driving followed by 2x8 hour flights and I’m buggered and it’s going to take a while to recover.
Ok I’m now stress free, living in South Africa, no work, studies, and only 2 kids instead of 5, no constant running around for various and many activities. I swim everyday and I enjoy cooking for and looking after my family as a role now rather than a chore.
Well I lie slightly, I’m stressed after nearly a year of doing things on my own in regards to ‘how to live here’ I’m struggling to resolve issues with banks etc in the UK and I’m stressed at feeling undervalued in the job market which has hindered my ability to function properly in this country without constant ‘permission’ from hubby to set household accounts up. But the task of renewing things this year is less daunting as I know how and where to get these things done at least.
But 3 weeks in the UK and my stress levels were sky high. Why? Trying to accommodate everyone. I take too much on, try to do too much, OK I’ll leave YOU out from my visit...oh you didn’t mean that did you?
I found UK driving stressful, most of my trips were at the end of the day in the dark, I’d forgotten how dark it was, street lights run out when you leave the town and many major roads don’t have them either, long journeys after a busy day. I struggled with headaches, tired eyes and stiff neck and back. It’s a chore I haven’t missed. I drive here, but apart from a day trip, its short local visits and I rarely drive at night here.
Each place I visited fed me, wanted to know about our ‘exciting’ lives in South Africa, they obviously don’t read my blog then, it’s mundane, it’s routine, I didn’t object but I found it different to inject something new into it and I tired of saying the same things.
I want/need to connect to the internet, use the phone, speak to hubby, followed by a long soak in the bath and a steaming mug of tea, chill in my pjs after a long day and a comfy bed, but that would be rude so I keep on going.
The there is the shopping and gifts, which to my dismay aren’t going to fit in the suitcases (they did in the end, but left little room for me to buy things) I’d forgotten how unfriendly the UK was, it was crowded, people were rude, pushing and shoving, tutting and complaining about the queues, banging into you with their shopping bags without so much as a sorry or a sideward’s glance.
I wanted/needed light and space. The UK was dark, I know it was winter but on one day I glanced at my watch thinking it was nearly 5pm but it was only 1.30pm, in the afternoon.
I missed my family and friends, but I didn’t miss my old lifestyle, I was ready to go home, I just needed some space.
Everything is arse backwards
Every house I stayed at in the 3 weeks back in the UK was different. I ran the hot tap but cold water came out, ah yes, new house, different taps, some taps even turned the wrong way, on some the H and the C had worn away so it was guess work.
There was liquid soap, bars of soap or no soap. My hands smelt of lavender, strawberry, mint.
The kettle is corded, cordless, for the stove. The jam was in the fridge, not the cupboard, it was decaf tea, brown sugar, spread not butter.
A duvet, several sheets and blankets, which layer did I sleep under? One pillow, 10 pillows, a brick for a pillow.
I’m not complaining everything was just different everywhere I stayed and I’m truely grateful for everyones hospitality.
‘Help yourself to anything you want/need’ Well I would if I could bloody well find where you’ve hid it.
There was liquid soap, bars of soap or no soap. My hands smelt of lavender, strawberry, mint.
The kettle is corded, cordless, for the stove. The jam was in the fridge, not the cupboard, it was decaf tea, brown sugar, spread not butter.
A duvet, several sheets and blankets, which layer did I sleep under? One pillow, 10 pillows, a brick for a pillow.
I’m not complaining everything was just different everywhere I stayed and I’m truely grateful for everyones hospitality.
‘Help yourself to anything you want/need’ Well I would if I could bloody well find where you’ve hid it.
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