I don't want celebrities to represent me

I'm really not happy with celebrities experiencing something then telling us all howe to manage it, how to behave, dress, have our hair, what size or how fit we should be etc, etc.

Thanks but my weekends are not spent on TV, I don't live with a hairdresser, know any make up artists, have a stylist to select my clothes and a PR team to ensure everything I do is just perfect for the cameras. 

I made a comment on twitter a few months ago, similar to the one above, and I was blocked by a celebrity.

I'm really glad these celebs have found a way to manage the menopause, have a baby, deal with depression, cook a dinner on a budget, build their own business, find the answer to eternal youth through fitness videos and ever so glad that they share everything they've learnt through their books, tv shows, interviews and columns in the papers, but......

They don't represent me.

Some of the things they talk about I'm sure people can relate to, but I can't. I'm not a size 8, I have no interest in exercising and eating myself healthy and running a marathon at 50. Whilst I've struggled for money in the past it was whilst I was paying for a mortgage, I had no dreams of saving for a holiday or getting bikini fit back when I was 25 and no desire to wear a bikini at the age of 50. Yes I know I can if I want, but I don't feel empowered by putting one on, I feel uncomfortable and it's all well and good telling me I can do whatever I want, I don't want to wear a bikini, discuss my sex life with anyone, think myself fit, learn how to craft, up cycle and/or learn how to blog for a living either.

Therefore I'd appreciate it that whilst some of you are following suit and living life to the large, wearing the bikini, not shaving your underarms, buying all the books, tagging and hash tagging all the celebs, that you'd think twice before offering me their advice on how if I just bought their book or followed them on social media, I'd have so much more understanding of what they're going through and I can relate it to my situation, which I can't, I don't want to and neither do I bloody relate. 

How to survive the World Cup 2018

It's the World Cup 2018. Four weeks of football, success and failures, who's to blame and did The England Manager make the right choices.

So here is what is going to happen over the upcoming weeks and a survival guide.

1. No amount of moaning about it will make it stop. You'll only stress yourself out.

2. Your normal television viewing will be interuppted, it will annoy you, but you can't do
anything about it.

3. Everyone will be talking about the it. The TV, papers, family, friends, colleagues, social
network sites, apart from not going out and staying off line, there is nothing you can do
about it.

How to get through the month of June and beyond.

1. Try and show some interest after all there won't be an awful lot else going on.

2. Don't even try and reach for the remote and don't expect that you get it back once the ref
blows his whistle, the match analysis is just as important and yes watching the replay of all
the goals is equally as important.

3. Keep the fridge full of drink and the cupboards stocked with snacks. It'll save you getting
disturbed and being sent out for supplies.

4. Do not mock your Other Half when watching and don't pull faces at their
mates when they come over to watch the games.

5. DO NOT, EVER say 'it's only a game' this is grounds for a divorce.

6. Your Other Half would rather be left in peace to watch the matches. They will only talk to
you during the adverts so don't view it as spending time together.

7. Don't expect the rules to be explained to you more than once and if your Other Half tries to
tell you them, look interested and ask no more than 2 questions.
(see previous post 'off side' rule)

8. Football is a game of opinion and if you don't know what you're talking about keep your
opinion to yourself.

9. Keep positive, use this time to spoil yourself, catch up with family and friends, read those
books and tweet without being nagged.

10. During matches remember this is probably the best time to go shopping, as hardly anyone
will be out.

Oh and finally, don't expect any sympathy and understanding to your needs as I will be avidly watching World Cup 2018 and will be tweeting in earnest. This is my pay back for all the reality show updates the rest of you post on social media the rest of the year.

You don't need to entertain children 24/7

Back from a recent trip to Egypt, the one thing that struck me the most was the number of children playing.

Playing by themselves, without any electronic items in sight anywhere.

This may have something to do with the lack of and poor wifi in Luxor, or the effects of the revolution in 2010, in terms of income, it might have something to do with the weather being good most of the year and the big open spaces, either way it reminded me of the differences between when I raised my kids in the 90's and the way other people raise their kids today.

In the UK and here in Dubai I see children all the time with iPads and mobile phones. Sitting in the trolley playing a game going round the supermarket, in restaurants, coffee shops and in their pushchairs. Nearly every single person I know has at least one gadget available for their child's use and in many cases I know of people who have bought a 2nd iPad for the 2nd child so they don't fight over it. Most families own game consoles and children as young as 8 have their own mobile phones with access to the internet and in many cases even social media accounts. 

As a mum now to 5 adults (almost, the last one turns 18 in April) I'm totally amazed and quite often stunned that (some) parents feel the need to have to entertain their children 24/7 and that (some) children without electronic devices can't seem to entertain themselves these days. With many parents quoting 'but we only have educational apps on them' Of course the child is going to complain when their 'screen time' is limited or interrupted, but they'll get used to it, over time, you'll just have to actually parent them for a little bit and teach them/show them how to behave without a hand held gadget.

I didn't own a mobile phone until I was 28 in 1999, that was also the year we purchased a computer and connected it to the internet at dial up speed. Up until that point I'd had a ZX Spectrum and a hand held packman and a walkman. My kids had various construction toys, toys for the garden and very few toys that required batteries, due to the expense. Toys were bought and sold at car boot sales, saved up for, for christmas and birthdays and borrowed from local toy libraries. We didn't have sky TV, but we did have a video player and borrowed and lent from family and friends.

Weekends and evenings were spent with friends, playing in the garden, with family and out in the street. The kids played unsupervised in the garden while I got on with household chores or played over the park with the neighbours kids, with at least one or two older children supervising or us parents with a flask of tea. Trips to the supermarket were done on the weekends and I usually had at least one child in tow whenever I had a doctors or dental appointment.

Holidays were 1 week a year camping and the occasional trip to the seaside, if the weather was nice. Trips to theme parks were reserved for birthday treats and school trips were local and only for the day.

When ever we went anywhere with the kids they packed themselves a small bag of toys and we added snacks, crayons and a colouring book. These bits and pieces would entertain them for hours on long car journeys, at the doctors or dentists, round the supermarket in the trolley, in their pushchair as we walked round town. We never took the kids for meals out, we didn't even have a McDonalds near us until we moved to Malvern in 2002.

My kids went through their entire primary school years without a mobile phone, none of their friends had one either, without TV's in their bedrooms and without demands for me to entertain them 24/7.

We didn't have the money, several of these years were spent as a single mum, there wasn't the number of gadgets around then as there is today.

We asked our family to club together for a DVD player for Christmas one year, for long car journeys in the mid 2000's that just ended up causing arguments and fights about who wanted to watch what. Eventually the kids had TVs in their bedrooms once they were over 14, they had mobile phones around the same age, but then there was no internet and few were capable of taking photo's. Then there were laptops when they went onto college or 6th form.

Don't get me wrong my kids were still little shits from time to time, or even most of the time. I couldn't blame it on technology, just 4 brothers, fighting to be the alpha male, bored with each others choice of activity but I did see a huge change in their behaviour, attitude and response to me and other adults once they did get access to game boys and TV's.

There's nothing wrong with having bored children, when I told my mum I was bored she'd find me some household chores to do, I soon decided I wasn't that bored and managed to entertain myself.

As an adult I probably spend way too much time on my laptop, phone and plonked in front of the TV, but as I'm an adult with no kids to parent and no job to go to, I can choose how to spend my time online, once I only do after I've done all the things I should be doing including going for a walk and cycling most days.

Children and how TV influences them

I came across this article on the BBC website about the effects of children being exposed to harmful material before the watershed.

We don't get a lot of British TV in South Africa apart from quiz and games shows, a couple of crime shows and Eastenders.

The report is by the National Association of Headteachers and I do think it's a bit strange that the BBC are advertising this message, especially as it is about programmes that they make, advertise and schedule viewing of. I watched Eastenders this evening, it was shown at 5.20pm it contained sex, violence, affairs, lying, family feuds & alcoholism. It could be said that this represents real life, but it is highly unlikely that all this happens in one evening, in one house, in one street. But I do agree that a lot of the story lines can help individuals with sensitive issues. I used to use episodes of soaps with my teaching and youth work to help relate to situations.

But it's not just adult television that influences your child, nor their access to the internet, children's programmes greatly influence your children.

On a recent trip to the UK staying with family and friends with young children there were 2 incidents that stood out and grabbed my attention.

The first being told about a friends child who had developed an American accent from watching too much TV, the second watching Adventure Time with my friends children aged 6-11, when one of the characters said to another 'to pass the monster you must stop her from crying and as everyone knows, to stop a woman from doing anything, you must make her think it's her idea.'

I am still gob smacked by what I heard.

Do you think your child watches too much TV? or is influenced by it and not just the adverts, but the contents of even children's programmes?