Friday 4 November 2016

One Daily Positive with Chickenruby - Looking for the good no matter how bad things are.

I've been posting a One Daily Positive now since January 1st 2015, shortly after we moved to Dubai. I linked it in with SnapHappyBritmums, FMSPhotoADay and Project 365 and this year Project 366. Although I've met some lovely people, I've not had the feedback and interaction I had hoped for with the photo prompts, so at the end of this year, I've decided just to continue with One Daily Positive, add my own photo's that reflect my day, rather than a prompt and continue posting in Project 365. I may occasionally dip into the other side, but it won't be via my blog.

As an expat for the past 6 years, first in South Africa and now in Dubai, there have been a lot of down times as well as plenty of highs. I've discovered though that when I blog about how great things are, no one seems actually that bothered and it can come across as just showing off, when I blog about the bad times, few relate or actually think 'the grass is always greener' or 'you're an expat, you don't have the same daily struggles as I do' but the truth is, life is exactly the same in regards to dealing with family issues, raising a family, work, housework, illness, etc. It just gets done in a different country and in a different way.

There are a few things though that make life very different from when we lived in the UK, I've moved a lot within the UK and had to reinvent myself along the way, make new friends and learn new things. Having children, getting divorced, moving house, dealing with death aren't easy. learning new skills to get through these times are hard enough without adding another language, a different way of life and managing a whole different set of expectations.

I had 2 kids leave home before we became expats and 2 kids leave home since living abroad, it's difficult to know if I'd feel the same away about empty nest syndrome if I'd remained in the UK and the kids were nearby, would it be the same with them being in Leeds and Belfast and a few miles away as it does knowing that they're all 3000 miles away?

Would work be as hard, if I knew I was in charge of when I may leave the country? Is making friends that difficult when you move within your own country, don't work and no longer have kids at home as a way of getting out and meeting new people?

I have no idea to be honest and when I do think about it too much I get overwhelmed and depressed. In an attempt to make life better, easier, the same as before, as in 'normal' I've failed. I've joined volunteer groups, they weren't right for me. I've met people for coffees in expat clubs, we haven't clicked. I returned to work, it was too stressful and the people I was working with were the same age as my kids, so that didn't work out either.

We have the minimum of one move left in us, which will probably be back to the UK in a few years time, or we may be asked to move somewhere else, or it may all come to an end suddenly and present us with a whole new set of problems/adventures.

Looking for a One Daily Positive has certainly helped me more than I could have imagined. It's made me look for the good every single day, even when I've been ill, my family have needed me or I've needed them, when I've been lonely, when times have been difficult, when we've packed up our entire lives and moved continents, when the kids left home.

I'd love it if you could join in with me.

Please feel free to add your One Daily Positives.

I don't have any rules, about liking, reading and commenting or badges you have to add to your blog and you don't have to have a daily positive everyday.

Feel free to add #OneDailyPositive on social media so others can follow your posts.

To enter the linky, click below:



2 comments:

  1. Great idea for a linky - I strongly believe that by looking for the positives we see more and can change your attitude. Thanks for sharing with #PoCoLo

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    Replies
    1. sadly i was the only one who linked up...lol...will try again in the new year when i have more time

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