After getting off to a flying start with my new job, I crashed and burned on Monday and it took a lot for me to go in on Tuesday and after lunch I was sent home. I managed to get back in on Wednesday and by 11am I was back home again with an agreement in place that I will take a sabbatical, take the time I need to grieve Stephanie as we approach the one year anniversary on Tuesday next week, reset and start again after the half term.
Sunday
Day 270 A day at the three counties show with child 2, his wife and the grandchildren. A roast dinner and I went to bed the minute they left as I was aching from head to toe. 
Monday
Day 271 Stopped on the way to work to take a photo of the autumn mist. Work is mentally challenging and exhausting. Hope it settles soon. Home to do nothing, everything aches, bath, watched TV and in bed by 9pm.
Tuesday
Day 272 I really struggled in work today and it all came out. I’m really struggling as we approach the anniversary of Stephanie’s death, made more difficult by the lack of support from family (not the kids) and lack of friends around us (distance) not helped by starting a new job and the constant anxiety of being asked about my family. Sent home early. Went to the football. Had to leave early for my train home and missed the equaliser.
Wednesday
Day 273 I felt more positive in work, then someone asked me how I was and as much as I tried to convince them and myself I was ok I ended up telling them about Stephanie. Work suggested I take the rest of the month off and start again after half term and have been extremely supportive considering I only started last week. I went home and just had a good cry, chilled out, read my book and went to bed early. The photo out the bedroom window hasn’t had a house behind the hedge since we moved in, in 2002. The one on the right is numbered 64 and on the left is 68. No 66 will be built soon.
Thursday
Day 274 I had a productive day rearranging the back room and dining room and sorting through the Halloween decorations. Moved the garden pots ready to put under the cold frame and bought more compost ready to pot up some bay cuttings. Had my nails done and met up with Peter for a coffee. Had dinner, a bath and watched TV.
Friday
Day 275 We stopped in Hereford for lunch, Abergavenny for a walk and set the van up in Tredegar Country Park for the weekend. Walked around the National Trust House, visited the local pub for dinner and dried off in the van watching the football. Asleep by 9.30pm.
Saturday
Day 276 A lazy morning then into Cwmbran to visit nephew and family, a spot of lunch, some shopping and back to the van to read, watch football and have an early night.
Things to make you smile:
I overheard two women talking about all their food allergies as in health style choices and one declared, 'there are so many foods I no longer enjoy, I might as well become coeliac' I'm not sure she gets it.
Camping in South Wales during Storm Amy. Well we were in the campervan.
Things that made me happy:
Being able to say 'I can't cope' and not having to offer a solution. Being listened to and a plan being put into place. Camping, visiting family and friends.
On the blog this week:
Post Comment Love - Link up with any post written this week
Word of the week - Welcome
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