5 ways of making friends abroad you may not have considered

Making friends while working or living abroad is an important part of settling in to your new home. Having a good social network is likely to result in a more successful move. But how to go about it?

There are many conventional ways to make friends, but for this post, let's have a look at ways a little outside the box to meet new people abroad:

Friends of friends

It may be best to try this before you leave for an assignment. As you are telling family and friends about your plans, ask if they know anyone in your destination city. If they do, ask to be put in touch with them. While it may or may not work out in the longer term, it can be a good way to meet a friendly face when you first arrive in your new home.

Events

Love abstract art? Jazz music? Slam poetry? Use websites like Eventbrite to find arts, community or charity events happening in your city. The more niche the event, the more likely it is that you can speak to others on a common topic, which should help break the ice.

Dating sites

InterNations Expat Insider survey 2017 showed that more than half of all respondents in relationships were involved with someone from another country. If you are single, consider checking out the local dating scene in your new country. Dating apps are an obvious starting point but if that feels too intense try attending singles events in your area.  There’s no guarantee that you’ll meet the love of your life, you could make some good friends along the way.

Volunteering

If you do find yourself with some time on your hands, consider helping others by volunteering in an area of interest. It could be related to your job or a hobby. Volunteering is a great way to meet people from the local community. It may also be worth checking if your employer has a Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) programme that you can take part in.

Religion

Last but by no means least, if you practice a religion, joining a local church, synagogue, mosque or temple may be a great way to meet local people of the same faith as well as making friends. Many religions have social events linked to practice including shared meals or celebrating events together.

Making friends abroad is one way of looking after your mental health while you are abroad. Building a local support network should help to make living abroad a fantastic experience both in terms of your career and personal life.

Don't neglect your physical health when you make a move overseas, protect yourself and get the best treatment possible in the event of an accident with comprehensive international expat health insurance. 

 This is a collaborative post. 

Parenting from abroad.

Our youngest child is in boarding school in the UK, having returned there from South Africa in 2013 ready to start his GCSE's. On July 6th 2017, his school days will be over and we can pat ourselves on the backs for successfully raising 5 children into adulthood, who currently still all talk to us, so we've done something right.

Our children have not gone to University, but they have gone into careers with further training. Our eldest child is disabled and in a care home in the UK. 2 of the boys joined the British Army and 1 went into hospitality. The 3 boys all had accommodation with their employment, 2 have now moved on, changed jobs and have their own homes, living with their girlfriends. 1 is still in the army, but the youngest is an altogether different challenge for us now.

The 2 older boys left home, from our home, the family home in the UK. We were at hand to help them move, prepare them for their move, move them in and have them visit on weekends, or us to them. The 1 who is still in the army, left home from South Africa and moved 6000 miles away to make his application, living with family while he waited for his starting date. He however asked all his questions from me, but he knew what he wanted to do, where he wanted to go and then he was off. We attended his passing out parade in Catterick and he moved on his own to Northern Ireland, where he has made a new life for himself, mates, a car and a girlfriend.

I stopped parenting on a daily basis in 2014 when the last child left home and then we moved from South Africa to Dubai. I went through empty nest syndrome, but I guess a move from one country to another softened the blow a little.

The youngest is proving to be a bit more difficult in regards to his future. He is applying for apprenticeships, we have no idea where in the UK he will end up living and working and we need to be there to help/sort him out over the coming months.

So on July 6th 2017 I will become a full time mum again to an 18 year old, an adult. We have a base in South Wales which I'll be moving into in mid June. I'll be staying in the UK until his apprenticeship starts, paying his deposit for somewhere to live and purchasing the basic items he will need.

I'm hoping we can get him a room in a house, with his own tenancy agreement, bills included, so he can start life with everything he needs, no additional bills to pay and his own space where he can feel relaxed, safe and comfortable as he transitions from the safety and security of boarding school, where he has had a slightly more sheltered life than his 3 older brothers.

I will find returning to Dubai difficult, as I won't be there for him to pop home to see on weekends, bringing washing or just wanting a home cooked meal.

I was able to be there and do just that for the 2 oldest boys, but not the youngest 2 and being so far away, makes it difficult for me to manage.

Not managing my children's lives, but managing my emotions as I go through yet another transitional stage in my life.

Should I cancel my UK holiday in light of recent terrorism?

Terrorist levels in the UK raised to critical levels now by Government.

A question I see a lot from bloggers is 'should I cancel my holiday to xxxxxxx? after an attack in another country. Maybe we should be re thinking the sensitivities as to asking those types of questions.

The media reports that I got locally about the Manchester bomb last week varied little from how the UK reports on terrorist bombs abroad, they focus on their own people over there.

I'm travelling to the UK next month, should I cancel my travel plans?

What advice would you give someone who posted that question?

How does someone posting that question while the situation is still ongoing make you feel about your country?

It would be much more beneficial in future if we asked these types of questions to the right people, rather than people who have no real idea of what a country is like, other than they've had a holiday there.

Do ever get an idea of what a country is really like, what the people are like from a 2-3 week visit?

Holidays are not real life, a tourist resort does not represent a country, its people, a way of life. You know that. Most British people are never more than a 2 hour drive, maximum from a holiday resort and even closer to tourist destinations. You know the misconceptions people have about the north if they're from the south or the opinions of city folk v country folk. Why make those assumptions about another country?

After the attacks in Turkey and Tunisia, people were posting these questions about whether it was safe to go there for their holidays. They were offered to rebook their flights and accommodation to go to other resorts and even other countries. People were flown home early. 
Is this the current case for people who are holidaying in the UK? Are other countries warning against travel there? I can't find anything other than general information on local websites here, but I have found this information from the British government. (May 24th 2017 9am UK time)

Credible information indicates terrorist groups continue plotting possible near-term attacks in Europe. All European countries remain potentially vulnerable to attacks from transnational terrorist organisations. 

This year we've travelled to Egypt and Hong Kong. My husband has also travelled to Saudi and Pakistan with work. Last year I was in Germany and South Africa, there was an attack near Munich when I was there, not terrorism, but that wasn't known at the time. We get asked all the time about our personal safety, especially in regards to flying back to Dubai. But we never get asked about our travel plans to the UK. Do we feel safe? No one ever asks us to reconsider our UK trips, like they do when we travel to other countries. Why is this? 

I of course won't be cancelling my plans to fly to the UK in 3 weeks time. I'm flying via Istanbul with Turkish Airlines, I've already travelled this route since the new restrictions with hand luggage. I expect security to have been tightened even further since the end of March.

A stress free family Christmas, past and present.

We've gone from a family of 7 to a family of 2 with the teen joining us for the holidays. We've also moved from the UK to South Africa and to Dubai over the past 5 years.
When the 5 kids were still at home, Christmas was a strange affair. My face book memories show the last Christmas day we had together was 2006 and then child 2 of 5 opted to go to his mum's on Christmas Eve at the last minute.

Most Christmases we let the kids choose where they wanted to go for the day, it just wasn't worth fighting over, the youngest 3 would choose to go to their dad's as they lived with us, the eldest 2, even as young children, would be waiting till the last minute to find out if their mum was having them or whether they'd be staying with us, it was unsettling, but we planned around it and either going to friends, parents or just staying at home on our own.

Christmas 2007

Christmas 2005

With friends

Christmas 2004, it snowed on Christmas day

 One of the houses on a neighbouring street in malvern, UK.

We put the decorations up, bought the gifts and put them under the tree and created our own Christmas usually on New Year's Eve, followed by half the street joining us for a party and a sleep over.

After moving abroad we had 2 Christmases where we were homeless. 2010 was spent with friends in London, prior to us moving to South Africa. Child 1 was let down by their mother at the very last moment so spent the day with her carers. Child 2 was living in Germany. Child 3 was working but we joined him in Reading for the night and boxing day and children 4 and 5 spent it with their dad.

In 2011 children 4 & 5 visited the UK prior to Christmas. We had Christmas day in the garden and swimming in the pool.

2012 The kids were in the UK with their Dad. We spent the day with our friends and their extended family.

2013 Granny joined us all.

2014 We were living in a hotel and hubby and I went to a cafe for coffee and a salad and the boys went to Subway round the corner, we then spent the rest of Christmas Day on the beach.

Christmas this year is just hubby and I and the teen, child 5 of 5. Child 1 is with her carers, child 2 with his girlfriend, child 3 is working and joining us for for the new year. Child 4 is with his dad.

We decided to eat out this year and went to the Sheraton for a Christmas Brunch, the teen surfaced at 8am after a phone call from the UK from Granny, who I assume got confused with the time difference or was just awake at 4am and phoned while she remembered. We opened gifts, had bacon and egg for breakfast and just lazed around before getting getting a taxi and going out. On arrival the teen was surprised to hear that this was a leisurely affair and not a eat and run and we planed on being their the full 3 hours. He ate quickly drank his weight in coke and logged into the hotel wifi and put his head phones in, hubby and I took our time, drank wine, sampled all the food and we got home at 5pm. Watched some TV and did the rounds of Skype and Facebook calls with family and friends.

For boxing day we had a full christmas dinner, cooked by the teen and I. We didn't start it until 4.30pm, at 4pm I was sat in Costa having a latte. We discovered the carrots had gone off and the potatoes were frozen, but it didn't deter us.

Bob enjoying the leftovers

Christmas has been and normally is stress free in our house, we start shopping early and don't have a set time to eat, just when it is ready. It would be lovely to have a proper family christmas, one on the day with all our family but even the family in the UK you far and wide and with work and the cost of flights during the holidays it probably won't be possible until we move back to the UK.

I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and holiday time, we'll be spending New Year with child 3 & 5 watching the fireworks at the Burj Khalifa and the Burj Al Arab from the beach.