You don't have cancer, so what next?

Last June I had a migraine that lasted 11 days. I've had migraines since I was a small child. I present with auras, visual disturbances, metallic taste in my mouth, I start to slur my words. This happens anything from 7 days to 5 minutes before the migraine starts. I'll have an episode like once every 12-18 months. The rest of the time, I get migraines that last 2-3 days, at least once every 6 weeks. They've become part of my life, I accept them and work around and through them. I also suffer with chronic pain in my neck after an injury at work 24 years ago, this aggravates the migraines also.

But every now and then I get one so bad, I need medical attention and in the past when I've gone to the hospital, meningitis has been suspected due to my aversion to light and touch and I've had numerous lumbar punctures. I did have viral meningitis in 2000.

This time I decided to go to my GP, I had visual field tests and an MRI. There's a tiny lesion on my right temple but this is probably scarring from the migraines and not the cause. I also have a cough and experiencing shooting pains and numbness in my thigh bone and around my hip joint. I am tired all the time, not sleepy, not lack of motivation, just tired.

The Doctor ran routine bloods.

A week later and now in the UK, she messages me to say I need to get a repeat test carried out. The white blood cell count, platelets and neutrophils indicate at the very least I have an infection of some sort. The count is slightly decreased and then my father died. My health was put on hold.

I return briefly to Dubai, still coughing and saw a pulmonologist. I'm a smoker, the cough is bothering him. I'm diagnosed with pneumonia, given antibiotics and an inhaler. I was hospitalised for pneumonia in 2007. I return to the UK for 2 weeks.

My blood cell count increases, so back to the GP, more tests, an MRI of my hips and thigh. There is nothing there, a chest CT, change in antibiotics. We move house.

I'm referred to an oncologist. My body isn't absorbing iron, this is corrected, yet still my white blood cells and platelets remain high. She suggests the coughing may be due to a silent reflux and recommends I take a one a day tablet. The coughing eases.

I have a bone marrow biopsy. I wait 2 weeks for the results. I know the oncologist just wants to rule cancer and bone marrow disease out, she says it may pick up the very early stages of a problem that she can deal with. I spend 2 weeks stressing out. I can't help but think the worse. I'm still having more frequent migraines, stopped taking the preventative medication that was prescribed by the neurologist last June, it's not working. The biopsy was one of the most uncomfortable things I've ever had done in my life and 3 weeks on the site is still quite sore, doesn't help I keep banging it.

So I got my results last Tuesday, no cancer, no bone marrow disease, no known cause. Repeat bloods are taken, count still high, body still not absorbing iron so lifestyle changes to diet are put in place, another migraine, medication doesn't work and still having pains in my hip and thigh bone. I'm still tired, even after 8 hours sleep.

I been googling my symptoms, it seems I'm stressed. No wonder with all this going on and my father dying last year. But all this started before he died and still doesn't explain the high white blood cell and platelet count.

I'm back in the UK next week for the summer, I'll be monitoring my levels of tiredness, the bone pain and migraines. I've stopped drinking coffee and reduced my intake of wheat products and dairy as these are the 3 things that can prevent your body from absorbing iron. Other than that I am at a loss as to what to do. I'm glad its not cancer or a bone marrow disease, but it leaves me in the same position I was in last year, I'm just not well and no one knows why.

One Daily Positive - Week 5

It's been a crap week. For those who've been reading my blog for a while, thank you for sticking with me as it's been all doom and gloom the past 6 months, starting with me being ill, my dad dying and me being isolated from my husband and home for 5 months, then a house move, still having health problems and seeing an oncologist and now the sudden death of my ex SIL. Fo those of you who have just started reading my blog, sorry, I can't guarantee it'll get any better. As I live in Dubai, life is always going to be slightly more complicated being so far away from my loved ones.

I'm pleased to report though that my mum finally moved house this week, quite an emotional time for me also as when I next visit the UK, my dad's entire life will be packed into 3 keepsake boxes and his essence will not have moved with my mum, I'm really not looking forward to my next trip home, for a funeral either.

28 Sunday Woke up to the news my ex SIL had died late last night, she was more than just that though. She was my friend and a surrogate mother to my children since we left the UK. She battled and beat breast cancer in 2016, but sadly it spread to her lungs and brain and she was given only a few months to live just under 3 weeks ago. She remained positive, had great strength, but sadly 36 hours after being admitted to hospital on Friday, she passed away. This photo was taken in 2013 when she and my niece, Lizi, came to visit us in South Africa. RIP Christine.

29 Monday Took Peter to the airport he's off to Saudi for the day, dropped my car off for a service and to get the window and air con repaired, met a friend for lunch and she gave me a lift home, will collect the car in the morning. Had my nails painted to reflect the colours of breast cancer support and awareness. Shocking pink for Inflammatory Breast Cancer, grey for brain and ivory for lung.

30 Tuesday Peter got home in the early hours as his flight was delayed due to technical problems and they had to change planes, he dropped me a the garage to collect my car, I did some shopping, and coffee and blogged and visited Safa park to take some more during/after photos of the Dubai Water Canal.

31 Wednesday Dropped Bob at Paw Parking and met my friend at Kite Beach for lunch and a stroll. Some 15kms and 4 hours later we got back to the car. Came home had a bath, a little sleep, then off to the pub for quiz night, we won again.

32 Thursday I spent the day cleaning the house, I struggled to get motivated, it's been a difficult week. I finally got round to food shopping at 5pm and hubby surprised me by meeting me in the supermarket to help out. By the time I got to sit down the cat had pinched my chair.

33 Friday I popped out in the morning to get some meat and have a coffee, met a woman at the mall and we sat chatting for a couple of hours which cheered me up no end. In the evening we had friends round for a BBQ and had a fantastic evening, one of the best for a long time.

34 Saturday We headed out to the beach for breakfast, coffee and a walk. I sat in the garden blogging and had a nap late afternoon before taking my friends car back from last night and joining them to watch the rugby and have dinner.

On the blog this week:

My Sunday Photo - Dubai Marina Now and Then 2015-2018

Triumphant Tales, Tweens Teens Beyond, Best Boot Forward - Getting out of a rut and blowing my own trumpet.

PoCoLo - Where are all the expats?

John's Giraffe

 Meet Raffy I never met John, but he was my son's friend, who sadly lost his battle in life with cancer last year, aged 18. 

Raffy was donated to the school where John was head boy in his memory. 

I had to look twice to work out what I was seeing as nothing surprises me anymore. 

 

Week 43 - One Daily Positive and Project 366. Newport to Dubai

I arrived back in Dubai on Friday, I'm shattered. I've unpacked and put most of it away. I really don't want to go to work tomorrow, I'm not getting any satisfaction from working, there's too much pressure on me, while I enjoy the teaching side and don't mind planning and evidencing work in my own time, I don't think I've ever worked in a job where I'm under so much scrutiny and asked to justify EVERY single action. I've already decided I will pack it in at the end of the school year in June, but at the moment I'm not sure I'm going to make it to the new year.

Whilst I had a lovely time in the UK, it was sadly a trip made due to family bereavement. My Father's youngest brother's funeral was on Monday. It was lovely a service, there were lots of people there from his involvement with Gwent Football Association and the bands he'd played in over the years.

Sadly on Thursday we heard the news that my Mother's eldest brother had passed away. The funeral will be in mid November and I won't be able to travel to attend.

Day 297 - Kids. Picked up a few craft activities for school, I did want to post a picture of the teen, but he was having none of it as usual.

Day 298 - Cute. My sisters missing cat, he ran away last year, she has moved towns since then, she finally located him and brought him back to the new house where he has settled back in.

Day 299 - Amazing. Lovely to meet up with my SIL who I haven't seen since her Cancer was diagnosed in July, she is half way through her treatment and looks fab. Her daughter (my niece) is spending new year with us and 2 of the boys, she needs a break, she doesn't want or need the break, but her mum and I have ganged up on her.

Day 300 - Light. I've really enjoyed being in the UK in autumn, the rain and the cold, it all looks so pretty, it's amazing how early it gets dark now. In Dubai we average 10-12 hours of light every day. While we miss the long summer evenings of the UK, we certainly don't miss the lack of sun in the winter.

Day 301 - Leaves. I've loved the sight, smell and sounds of autumn. 

Day 302 - Dark. Back in Dubai, an evening at sunset spent on the beach, I've been sleeping the rest of the time.

Day 303 - Trick. I hate this part, the unpacking and eventual putting away of stuff. 

Sun Cream in Africa

For the last few days we've had nothing but rain, which suits me and it's also given my skin a break from using sun creams, that I find are quite greasy, take an age to dry and often stain clothes. It has been nice to shower, dress and do hair under 15 minutes rather than spending up to 45 minutes (depending on which sun creams I use) waiting for the sun cream to dry.

Every day is tiresome, but it's not only cancer I'm protecting myself against it's the ageing process that is sped up from the sun, so many people here have that leathery skin look from the out door life having not used sun cream.

Even in the rain I still use factor 50 sun cream on my face daily as a moisturiser under my foundation. I use the one from Boots in the No 7 range as it's none greasy, drys well and isn't shiny.

I just need to find a sun cream that I can use daily on the rest of my body, one that dries quickly, is none greasy and doesn't stain my clothes. it's ok when you're on holiday, hanging around waiting 30+ minutes for it to dry, but not every day, when you've places to go and thinks to do.

I've tried the big branded names and the supermarket own brands, but it's too expensive to keep trying new products so I was hoping you'd be able to recommend products I could buy, that offer not only the sun factor protection, the higher the better, it reaches 30c here in the summer and is around 20c in the day time in the winter, are reasonably priced and most importantly don't take ages to dry, aren't greasy or stain clothes.

Why as an expat you need to find a new family.

Life as an expat?

Is it for you?

Does your family understand and realise how much you need them?

Where do you call home?

We moved lock, stock and barrel to South Africa nearly 2 years ago, since then we've renewed our 2 year visa so we can stay here until January 2016 and then apply for residency. This would allow the eldest child to complete University and the youngest to Matric.
I would then be able to apply for work and have the bills in my name, making things easier on us all round.

We left 3 adult children in the UK, they'd already left home and in fact the middle one had been living in Germany for 2 years when we left. Our parents, siblings, nephews and nieces remain in the UK and everyone has been to visit us and we have course have been back to see them.
All 3 children have had medical emergencies, in the UK, since we've been here and we are happy wih the way family and friends handled it. There have been 2 funerals, the death of my Uncle in Dec 2011 and my Aunt in Sept 2012. The birth of my niece in Feb 2011 and the horrific ordeal my sister went through giving birth. My Fathers heart attack in June 2012 and the near loss of life with my 15 year old (step) nephew this month, when a wall at school collapsed on him.
But we've been there when we can, flown back for my Father and had already planned visits around the time of the funerals.

The thing is, no one is here for us, no one can just pop in when we have an emergency. Both children here have been in hospital, one had emergency surgery. I've had surgery on my neck and there have been the general illnesses like migraines, flu and stomach bugs, but they're not life threatening and we've had to deal with them as a unit of 4 on our own.

So this is why I call South Africa home.

I've built a network of friends I can trust, whose opinion I value and who I can rely on when we need things, be it money after losing a bank card and not being able to get a replacement for 24 hours, lifts to school because the car is in the garage or won't start, looking after when ill, meals cooked and homework done. It took a year to establish this, a year of struggling, lonliness and no idea of how to do anything or get anything done.

A year of family and friends back in the homeland not understanding why you are moaning 'look at the lifestyle, your finances, the sun, the pool, what the hell have you got to complain about?'
A trip to the Doctors to ask for help, anti depressents, psychologists, getting help around the home, asking for help and opening up.

The most recent experience on a visit back to the UK made me realise where home is and why I was desperate to get back. It wasn't just about the weather, the sleeping in different beds, living out of a suitcase, not being met at the airport on arrival. It was the plain and simple fact that I converted the cost of things into Rand and refused to pay R15 for a can of coke and I pulled up at the petrol station and sat in my car for a few minutes before I realised that I had to put my own fuel in.

South Africa is home now, I know how things work here, I know what channel I want on DSTV and found Sky confusing.

I like having my bags packed even if they do put the meat in with the vegetables. I like the open space. I like the security of living on a golf estate. I like my new lifestyle now that I am working and using my skills and qualifications (as a volunteer).

But most of all I love pulling up at the petrol station for a F1 pit stop, refueled, water, oil and tyres checked, without asking and back on the track in record time.

Why you need a smear test.

I am aware that a smear test cannot identify Ovarian Cancer but there's no reason not to have one done.

A woman I know has just died. She was 32 and leaves behind a husband and 2 young children.

I used to help run a football club and Sam was one of many volunteers. But Sam always gave that little bit more.

She spent hours begging and borrowing around town for donations for the big fundraising event and when she fell short, she'd dig deep into her own pockets. She qualified as an FA coach doing everything she could to support the club, realising the value of such a club in her local community.

You'd find her on a Saturday morning helping with the teas and bacon buttes and on Presentation night she'd arrive early to set up and stay late to tidy away.

Sam and I were not friends, more acquaintances, most mornings I'd see her pass my house as she dropped the children at school and walked up the road to work. She'd always stop for a chat or wave at me in the kitchen window.

Sam had cancer, she died 6 weeks after being taken ill. The cancer spread to her liver, lungs and heart, having started off as undiagnosed ovarian cancer.

According to her friends Sam was very brave in her final days at St Richards hospice in Worcester.

So this is why you need a smear test, I've had one recently, it's not pleasant, it's slightly embarrassing and is uncomfortable.

But it could save your life and save you from suffering in pain and save your husband and children suffering when you are gone.

Stuck in a rut? Baby steps, is all it takes

Today is a day for Blogging...well it's the last day of the month and the internet gets reset tomorrow, so it would be silly not to use it up.

This weeks #groovymum challenge by kateonthinice is all about Baby steps and how to take them through a variety of challenges that Kate sets each week. You can link your blog post here http://kateonthinice.wordpress.com/2012/01/31/what-are-the-baby-steps-to-changing-your-life/

I have till Monday to put this blog up, but life throws me enough challenges and I have more than enough to do without creating new ones, so in time honoured tradition (this blog hop has only been running since September 2011) I will reflect on the week and see where I met these challenges.

1. Body – Sign up to do a Sports Relief Mile. Check out http://www.sportrelief.com/the-mile There are challenges of varying types for different levels of fitness so do take a look whether you are a rampant runner or a slouch potato.
OK NOT FOR ME, UNLESS ANYONE KNOWS HOW I CAN DO THIS FROM SOUTH AFRICA, BUT I'M ALREADY GIVING MY TIME FREELY HERE AND SWIMMING A MILE A DAY IN THE POOL AT THE GYM

2. Mind – Do you have a favourite artist? Would you like to know more about art? How can you incorporate more art in your life? Blog about it and tell us more.
NO I DONT HAVE A FAVOURITE ARTIST, BUT I KNOW WHAT I LIKE AND WHAT I DON'T LIKE AND I HATE/LOATHE (TOO STRONG?) I CAN'T STAND THE KIND OF ART THE EVOKES THE 'EMPORERS NEW COAT' REACTION. HUBBY WAS GIVEN THIS PIECE OF ART WORK, I THINK MY YEAR OLD NIECE COULD DO IT, IT MAY BE WORTH A FEW HUNDRED POUNDS, BUT IT'S WORTHLESS TO ME AS I DON'T LIKE IT.



3. Spirit – Have you ever meditated or found other ways to calm the soul? Is this something you might like to investigate further? Tell us about it and then we can all learn new methods that might work for us.
I'VE TRIED RELAXATION TAPES, USING THE ONES GIVEN OUT AT TRAINING COURSES, YOU KNOW THE TYPE ON TEAM BUILDING DAYS. IF IT'S SUGGESTED I RELAX, OR I'M FORCED TO RELAX, MY STRESS LEVELS GO THROUGH THE BLOODY ROOF...SO NO SUGGESTIONS, JUST EACH TO THEIR OWN.

4. Blogging – You are a woman and you will have women in your world, alive or dead, who matter to you. Why not write 90 words (or more or less) about her and link up to this charity blog hop for Breakthrough Breast Cancer? Cllick here to take part or to read stories of some rather wonderful women http://kateonthinice.wordpress.com/2012/01/26/i-am-looking-for-90-bloggers-to-support-breakthrough-breast-cancer/
THERE’S NOT AN EVENT OR OCCASSION THAT GOES BY WITHOUT ME THINKING OF MY GRAN. SHE WAS STRONG, HELD FORCEFUL OPINIONS, BUT SHE WAS PROUD OF ME AND SHE NEVER FAILED TO TELL ME THIS.
SHE DIED ON OCTOBER 14TH 2005 AGED 92 OF OLD AGE, HELPED ALONG WITH LUNG CANCER.
I WISH I COULD TELL HER ABOUT MY NEW LIFE IN SOUTH AFRICA, OF HOW WELL THE CHILDREN ARE DOING AND SEND HER ENDLESS PHOTOS AND LETTERS SHE COULD SHOW OFF TO HER FRIENDS.

I'm afraid I was very taken into hospital a few days after this picture was taken with viral meningitus, hence why I look so ill.
I WISH SHE WAS HERE.



5. Special Days – It is National Storytelling Week and you can find out more here http://sfs.org.uk/nswevents2012 Why not ring the changes and write up a short story on your blog?
YOU WANT A SHORT STORY FOR MY BLOG. I DON'T HAVE A SHORT STORY BUT I DO HAVE CHAPTER ONE OF A STORY I'VE BEEN WRITING YOU CAN READ HERE
http://www.chickenruby.com/2012/01/chapter-one-unedited.html


6. The Big Question – Who are you? Take this as you will. Blog about who you are or perhaps write an “About Me” page for your blog. Is it easy or challenging to say who you are? What can you learn from that?
UP AND RUNNING, INFACT BEEN ONTO IT TODAY CHECK OUT WHO'S THE CHICKEN HERE http://www.chickenruby.com/p/who-is-chicken.html

Sun hats and sun cream

What is going on, people of South Africa?

Do you not know how hot it is?

Do you not realise that people can get cancer from sun damage? let alone the scrawny, leathery skin.

And why are there tanning machines in my gym?

The selection of suncreams in the supermarkets is poor and the prices are very high. How do families on low incomes here afford to buy it?

I find my skin is in poor condition and my face is really dry. I can't afford to test every product on the market, especially the water resistant ones, to find one that actually works. (We were all badly burnt in Durban 2 weeks ago) As a family of 4 we use sun cream every day, even just getting in and out of the car, popping to the shops, moving from class to class the sun 'gets' you.

And hats? I'm starting to see straw boaters in Mr Price and most of the camping/walking/outdoor shops along with baseball caps, but again they are few and far between and around R50+. The kids of course won't wear 'floppy' hats and are constantly losing their baseball caps and getting burnt on the back of their neck.

Has anyone got any suggestions? Know the best places to buy hats, suncream that they'd like to share with me?