Feeling vulnerable during Covid-19

I'm a 48 year old woman, fit and healthy (ish) not having to worry financially and living in a nice house in a nice town in the UK. My husband is 3000 miles away in Dubai and we're separated for the foreseeable future.
We're used to spending a lot of time apart with his job, travelling and with our family in England, Wales, Northern Ireland and Australia. But we always have an end date, a flight home booked and we often meet up up and join one another on our trips.

We think nothing of booking a flight, jumping on a plane, collecting car hire, sorting hotels and travelling at the drop of a hat, on our own or together. We've had a lot of adventures living in South Africa and Dubai and in between. Raising 5 children between us, one with profound disabilities. Managing lives in different countries, maintaining homes and lives simultaneously and dealing with death.

So yes we're capable, together and on our own we are able top look after ourselves and others when needed.

We're also lonely and isolated. Peter is in Dubai on his own, he is working from home.

I'm in the UK in our former family home but on my own (cat and dog don't count when it comes to feeling vulnerable) and this post isn't about being lonely.

Last Friday morning at 6am I fell down the stairs, I banged my head, my shoulder and jarred my neck. I slipped on the last 5 steps.

Peter had conference calls and wasn't due to ring me till 9am UK time. I'm ok now but it got me thinking....what if?

We have a plan, we've never had to implement it. If I can't get hold of Peter throughout a working day or when he's travelling he will message me in response to my calls to say he's in meetings, he will then phone at the earliest opportunity. When I'm travelling I will send him messages throughout the day, notifying him of my current location and when I'm due to be back at the house or my next destination.

There have been times of minor worries such as when I've taken a 24 hour trip and haven't had access to the internet, but we've still been able to make quick short and expensive telephone calls to say we're ok.

My mum messages or facebooks me everyday, so I know she's OK, if I couldn't get hold of her my niece and her husband live in the town. I've also got a car now so I could drive down. My MIL lives near her daughter and grandchildren, so they are around to check in on her.

The rest of our family and friends live with their partner or have older children at home, or like my husband and youngest child who are working daily and their absence would be noticed.

My next door neighbour and I have joked that the Thursday night clap for key workers has turned into a roll call for the street, but even she has her sister and a nephew dropping off her shopping. I see different neighbours daily, who ask if I need anything and hear them in their gardens and I know they hear me when I'm calling the dog or the cat.

Friends are checking in with me, my friends who I have regular contact with are either abroad or don't know one another. I'm not asking for anyone to take responsibility for me. I'm not vulnerable due to health, but I'm feeling vulnerable after falling down the stairs and realising I could have lain there for about 12 hours before Peter would've put the plan into action.

Just try to remember we're all struggling with this lockdown, whether it's financially, emotionally with home schooling and our health or physically going out to as a key worker everyday that we're all feeling vulnerable right now and that includes those of us who don't have financial or physical problems, children to teach or key worker jobs, we're just going through it differently.

I often feel isolated and lonely, this is the first time I've really felt vulnerable.

How the Mike Bolhuis flamingo project is also supporting vulnerable children in South Africa.

I came across Mike Bolhuis and the Flamingo Project through a friend in South Africa. I’m here for 2 weeks working with volunteers who support children’s charities year-round. When I’m not in South Africa I work behind the scenes, promoting, fund raising and online support. You can read about my last visit in December 2018, supporting a Christmas Charity.

After recent droughts in South Africa Mike took it upon himself to try and rescue hundreds of dehydrated and starving flamingo chicks, which hatched back in February in Kamfersdam, Kimberley.

Photo Credit

These chicks have now been released back into their natural habitat, but Mike was left with 100’s of teddy bears the public had donated for the flamingo chicks to snuggle up to, to keep warm and to play with.

I spoke to Mike this week to thank him for the teddy bears, which are now washed, repaired and waiting to be rehoused to 300 vulnerable children living in poverty or in orphanages in and around Pretoria.

You can read more about Mike’s Flamingo rescue on his face book page.

Flamingoes are one of my favourite birds and I often visit Ras Al Khor bird santuary where I live in Dubai and I went in search of the flamingoes in the Western Cape in July 2015.

I'm, pleased Mike and the volunteers have been successful with their project, just a shame I didn't arrive earlier and I could have volunteered.

Supporting Children living in poverty in South Africa

I spent 4 years living in South Africa and have been back many times to visit the charities I worked 
with when we lived there.

There are numerous charities in South Africa supporting children living in poverty in many different ways.

The Viva Foundation who supply affordable education and support the local community with a 
variety of projects. Including camping in a township, taking part in an arts project.

Dignity Dreams providing women with washable and reusable sanitary products. I reviewed them.

Santa Shoebox Project collect and distribute 110,000 Christmas gifts throughout the country each 
year. My Santa Shoebox journey.

Kungwini Welfare Organisation provide residential care for adults and children with learning 
difficulties, as well as providing education in their local community. I first started making scarves 
with them in 2014 raising funds for supplies for the workshop

I'm back in South Africa in September 2018. I've funded my own trip and will be staying with friends as I've done previously, since we relocated to Dubai.

What I'll be doing as well as visiting and supporting Kungwini and Santa Shoebox is to visit the 
children in the townships that I've met through these organisations over the years and bring a little  
extra happiness into their lives.

This could be through painting a classroom, holding a birthday party, donating toiletries and or 
educational supplies and I'd like you to help me succeed by donating £5 in exchange for a handmade scarf. That's it, that's all you have to do, just visit my PayPal account and donate.

In exchange for your £5, I'll select a scarf at random that I've made and post it to you. I'll tweet out a 
thank you, post the total amount raised, provide invoices and post photos online (with permission) of 
the children who have received your donation. Every penny raised will be spent directly on children 
living in poverty.

Visit my Paypal account, donate and then message me with your address on:

Twitter Facebook Instagram

What have your children asked for this Christmas

I've seen lots of Christmas wish lists being written to Santa over the past few weeks, parents taking photographs of children snuggled up in bed reading the Argos catalogue.

I read about parents worrying how they are going to afford christmas this year and have seen the face book post that is doing the rounds how parents must only give the children small gifts from Santa.

I contacted a facility last week in South Africa, a children's home, with 17 kids, living in Pretoria who have been abandoned, absurd, orphaned or the parents haven't had the money to look after their children.

Some children are reunited with their wider families, some fostered, some adopted. Some of the children have been in the home for a long time.

I asked the house mother for a christmas wish list, I said I probably couldn't afford to buy everything on the list, but I'm hoping one or two of you would like to donate via Go Fund Me or Paypal to help make their wish come true.

I've already collected a few bits and pieces from various places, but here is the list if you can help in anyway.

You'll see it's more of a 'need' than a 'want' and very basic

Boy 12
Rugby Ball, Pyjamas, slippers, sandals and some nice clothes for church.

Girl 9
Doll, Puzzle, Teddy, Pyjamas, slippers, sandals and nice cloths for church

Girl 7
Horse toys, teddy, doll, pyjamas, slippers, dress and jeans

Girl 4
Doll, teddy, t shirt, jeans, sandals, dress, underwear, pyjamas and slippers

Boy 13
Sandals, pyjamas, slippers and clothes for church

Girl 8
Doll, dress, sandals, teddy, pyjamas and slippers

Girl 13
Teddy, long dress, heels, ballet lessons

Girl 6
Doll, teddy and tea set

Girl 14
Sandals, dress and money for her operation

Boy 14
Sandals, pyjamas, slippers and clothes for church

Boy 10
Cricket set, pyjamas, slippers, sandals, clothes for church

Girl 6
Clothes for church, shoes and a bag

Girl 12
Jeans, hat, shirt and shoes

Boy 3
Toy car, sandals and nappies

Girl 17
Dress and sandals

Girl 15
Clothes and shoes for church

Girl 10
Clothes and shoes for church

Pledging, Shopping and drop off for Santa Shoebox

As the drop off around South Africa open, the pledging will close, but that doesn't mean you can't still join in.I'd like to invite to take a look at what we are actually doing in Pretoria, how to pledge, what and how to pack and where to drop off. Of course if you live over seas you can still pledge a virtual box or you can donate to my Go Fund Me page for additional costs involved for the volunteer work I'm doing during my 5 weeks here.

How to Pledge

Register on line here and follow the instructions. Pledge for Pretoria North or Pretoria east - Centurion please

Shop

Soap

Face cloth

Toothpaste

Toothbrush

Sweets

Item of clothing

Educational supplies

Toy, make up, costume jewellery, ball, puzzle, teddybear

Decorate a box or pop to Stor_age for a free one

Pack

Drop off Pretoria North

We'll be at the following address 23rd and 24th October 2015 from 1pm till 7pm and Saturday 8am till 2pm

NG Villieria Hall

571 24th Avenue

Villieria

Pretoria

0186

GPS Coordinates Lat: -25.712975641746 Lng: 28.227052688598633

Contact Suzanne 072913628

Drop off Midstream
Ashwood House Office F08
Shopping Centre, Midstream
Friday 23rd October 2015 1pm - 7.30pm
Saturday 24th october 2015 8am till 1pm
Telephone for directions 0827322613

Drop off Pretoria East

Date: Thu, 29/10/2015 Time: 13:30 pm to 19:30 pm
Date: Fri, 30/10/2015 Time: 07:30 am to 19:30 pm
Date: Sat, 31/10/2015 Time: 08:30 am to 14:30 pm

Pretoria Chinese School, Cnr Halse & Dennil Street, Wingatepark, Pretoria, 0181
GPS Coordinates: -25.828343, 28.266945

Stay for a few hours, meet some lovely people, have a cake, a chat and volunteer your time

Don't just blog it, go and do it...Volunteer to make a difference.

I keep seeing what can only be described as 'jumping on the bandwagon' posts, tweets and Facebook updates.

It seems the whole world cares these days about every single issue.

A celebrity posts a photo of a hunter in Africa and the world jumps on board.

A newspaper publishes a photo of a boy, dead, washed up on the beach and everyone is writing about it and raising money by providing a link to a donation page to support the migrants who made it safely across the water.

A child goes missing or is murdered and the world stands still and asks how it could happen.

There's a Tsunami, a landslide, a bombing, 100's of people crushed. Everyday there is a news story about the plight of someone, a nation etc every single day.

Some stories become global, some are covered up, some never see the light of day.

But does 'jumping on the band wagon' when a story go global, actually help in anyway to change opinions, views, activities of individuals, groups, religion, countries or does it just raise awareness for a day, a few thousand pounds for a charity or just a case of having a clear out and donated unwanted items to a charity?

But what then? It simply becomes yesterday's news, tomorrow's chip papers and we all move back to our safe lives and await the next disaster.

I'm sure a lot of people feel better for it having reposted, made a donation or written a blog post with a donation link, but is it actually helping? changing lives long term or changing the way world behaves?

There have been many issues over the past few years that have touched my heart, made me think there for the grace of god go I. I did the ice bucket challenge and donated, I wrote a blog post. I had plenty of shares, comments and views but did my R200 actually make a difference to anyone's life? I have no idea, as I never went back to the organisation I donated to, to ask.

I've baked cakes for the Macmillan coffee morning, I've sponsored friends children to raise funds for their school/Children in Need but I've never asked, how my small donation added up with everyone else's, what the money was spent on? services or equipment? I have no idea.

So I stopped and I focused on supporting vulnerable children in South Africa. Yes I've asked for money for donations for a pushchair so a mother could take her disabled child with her to work so she didn't lose money. I've asked for money to buy sweets for children in informal settlements for Easter, money to bake cakes for a birthday or Christmas. I spent 4 years promoting a charity that collects and distributes over 100,000 gifts to disadvantaged children in South Africa, built and equipped a school a 2 hour drive west of Kruger National Park, helped locals in a search and rescue to find 3 boys swept away by floods. I've provided blankets for the needy in winter, helped women get into employment, trained teachers, painted shacks in local communities. I've supported an organisation with providing rape counselling.

Despite now living in Dubai, I've still supported these charities this year, making scarves and bags to sell to raise funds, blog posts and running social media accounts. I've raised funds from family and friends, but it just isn't enough.

Companies are ignoring me, charities won't work with me, jeez I can't even get a couple of online groups to RT me and promote the charity work I do. Why not? Because I don't tell individual's stories of their suffering, I don't post pictures of the vulnerable children or dare I say it I'm just NOT popular or influential for people to bother with me.

I'm not in it to look good, I'm not in it for the number of shares, likes and RT's on social media. I'm in it because this is what I do, support vulnerable children, raise funds (spend my own money) give my time, go back year on year to volunteer, support and just be there to help out in anyway I can.

I have a Go Fund Me page, I tried Just Giving, I've asked directly for donations and every penny and every item I've been given has gone directly to a child in need. Not one penny has been taken out for any kind of expense. I provide every receipt, I show you what was purchased and tell you where it was taken. Where I am allowed I will take a photo of the child/organisation to show you them with your donation, but they look happy in the pictures, because they are happy with the gift, they want to smile for the cameras and despite what you see in the media, poverty does not always mean upset.

I just know what else I can do, to make a bigger difference to the children and organisations I support other than just keep on giving them my time, which makes more of a difference to people's lives than it does 'jumping on the bandwagon' then moving onto the next 'popular' news item.

If anyone wants to know more about the projects I'm working on in South Africa in October and November please get in touch. In the meantime just give me shout out to my Go Fund Me page to see what I'm fundraising for and watch out for social media updates while I'm in South Africa to see how time given can actually change lives far more than just blogging about it.

Donate, buy or a bake a cake to support orphans and vulnerable children in South Africa

CAN I TEMPT YOU TO BUY A CAKE?

You don't get to eat the cake, but a child in a township does.

We need 1000 cakes for Viva Foundation Orphans and Vulnerable Children Family Day on June 7th.

If you're in Pretoria and can bake then just let me know how many you can commit to baking.

If you want to make a donation you can do so either in South Africa here or the UK through Paypal thechickendoesjoburg@gmail.com 

Please mark your donation CAKE.

There doesn't need to be a birthday to eat cake, it's just as much fun.

It can be Easter or Christmas.

Decorated or plain.

Over the past 3 1/2 years since I've been living in South Africa I estimate I have baked around 4000 township cup cakes.

World Baking Day. Cake making for charity in South Africa

It's World Baking Day and I've Pledged to Bake for the Children at The Viva Foundation.

I baked 141 cupcakes. I'm not icing them, as I do this on a regular basis for the various charities and townships I support and I need to keep the costs as low as possible.

June 7th is Viva's Family Day we will be baking 1000 cupcakes. That means there will be 1000 Orphans and Vulnerable Children as guests and we will need donations for cakes, drinks, etc.

Please contact me via my blog, twitter, Facebook or email.