Monday 19 March 2012

Oh I was tagged in a Mother's Day meme

I've been tagged by @kateonthinice the founder of #groovymums over at to blog about What mother's day means to me.

I won't be tagging anyone else, as I'm a day late for the UK, as Mother's Day isn't actually until May here.

I received a facebook message from my 19 year old son wishing me a lovely day, my 17 year old tweeted me from his bedroom and the 13 year old asked hubby 'Did we get anything for mum?'
My step children haven't sent or acknowledged me, but then post may be 'lost' and step son has just moved back in with his Mother, and I doubt he's remembered her either.

Describe Motherhood in three words
Overwhelming, Challenging, Hard

Does your experience differ from your mother’s? How?.
My mum never worked when we were kids apart from 9 months when I was 14, but she always did voluntary work with the eldery, shopping, trips out and she played a lot of sport. We had regular babysitters in the evenings if my dad was away, while she played badminton and walked us to school every morning and collected us every afternoon. She run us round to all our after school activities, Brownies, Swimming, Gym, Youth Clubs and then school and youth discos.
When my children were small I had to work, we needed two incomes, I spent two years as a single parent, but never claimed any benefits. I used to work shifts around my then husbands job in care and youth work and I also did voluntary work to build my CV up alongside regular study.
I run the kids to all their activites also and like my mum I've run the home and moved on quite a few occassions with my hubbies job, like we did with my father's job.
My mother doesn't 'do' cooking, she doesn't enjoy it, she did cook a meal for us every evening, but if there was any chance we could eat out, or request fish and chips she'd be more than happy. I like cooking, I like preparing meals for the children, they like to experiment and enjoy 'tasty' food.
I'm much more relaxed with my children and their friends, we always have a house full of children, I drive miles with the kids for their activites, whereas my mum kept things local which meant I wasn't able to progress further with my activities.
My children have far more freedom than we did, I allow them to go out just for the sake of it, stay over at friends houses mid week, but I don't let them have TV's in their rooms.

I'm going to stop now, there are too many differences and I could write for ever about them.

What’s the hardest thing about being a mum?
I'm not sure there is anything 'hard' about being a mum. I can't compare it too anything else. I have single friends, childless, I don't envy their 'freedom/lonliness' I guess sometimes the hard part about being a mum is never being allowed to switch off and being judged by other parents, teachers, family and friends for the childrens behaviour.

What’s the best thing?
Well there are laughs, fun times, wonderful experiences. Companionship, friendship, achievements.

How has it changed you?
Again I'm not sure it has. I don't know what I would have been like if I hadn't had kids.

What do you hope for your children?
I hope my children are happy and I hope they continue to aim high.
I always recall my parents being disappointed that I had C for achievement, they wanted more, expected more. I had A for effort and that's all I want for my kids. I want them to do their best and that's all.

What do you fear for them?
I fear my children will struggle, that they will have to work hard and get overlooked.

What makes it all worthwhile?
Don't expect they will go down well, but it makes it worthwhile when they leave home. My first 3 kids left home aged 18, they went on into further education and training and they are happy and settled and left behind in the UK. If the last 2 can leave home at 18 then it will all have been worthwhile.

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